by Max Barry

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The Nation formally by the name of 9003

“They're taking the friends to Isengrade” The Great Goblin

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Auxiliary

Location: Mordor

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

9003

Population15.232 billion

CapitalMordor
LeaderThe Great Goblin
Faith9002ism

Currencygold bar
Animalhuman

The Nation formally by the name of 9003 is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Great Goblin with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, keen interest in outer space, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.232 billion public filth are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Law & Order are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordor. The average income tax rate is 2.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Slave to the man economy, worth a remarkable 4,876 trillion gold bars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 320,169 gold bars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A new apartment is worth a thousand betrayals, hunters have been known to lose limbs while attempting to 'play tag' with their prey, citizens simply have to point a weapon at a government official to get what they want, and suppression of pro-democracy protests is a daily occurrence. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. 9003's national animal is the human, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is 9002ism.

9003 is ranked 102,537th in the world and 27th in Mordor for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 145.35 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 150thMost Avoided: 180thLargest Mining Sector: 216thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 220thMost Corrupt Governments: 229thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 326thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 362ndLargest Insurance Industry: 403rdHighest Poor Incomes: 454thFattest Citizens: 533rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 543rdMost Ignorant Citizens: 567thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 591stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 869thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 937thLargest Black Market: 1,003rdHighest Average Incomes: 1,299thHighest Economic Output: 1,587thTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 1,695thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,737thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,810thLargest Retail Industry: 2,158thMost Devout: 2,593rdMost Armed: 2,624thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,880thMost Stationary: 4,192ndNudest: 4,441stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4,963rdMost Influential: 7,393rdTop
10%
Lowest Crime Rates: 8,815thMost Authoritarian: 9,059thLargest Governments: 9,556thMost Conservative: 9,715thLargest Populations: 9,779thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 10,299thMost Subsidized Industry: 11,637thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15,375thRudest Citizens: 16,130th
Top
5%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionNudest: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionTop
10%
Largest Black Market: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionMost Devout: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionFattest Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 3rd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 3rd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : 9003 was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Economic Output.
  • : Following new legislation in 9003, suppression of pro-democracy protests is a daily occurrence.
  • : Following new legislation in 9003, citizens simply have to point a weapon at a government official to get what they want.
  • : Following new legislation in 9003, hunters have been known to lose limbs while attempting to 'play tag' with their prey.
  • : Following new legislation in 9003, a new apartment is worth a thousand betrayals.
  • : Following new legislation in 9003, people spend a lot on hair and nails.
  • : 9003 lodged a message on the Mordor Regional Message Board.
  • : 9003 lodged a message on the Mordor Regional Message Board.
  • : 9003 resigned from the World Assembly.
  • : 9003 was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Influential.

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