by Max Barry

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The Black Holy Dominion of A Share of the Adidas AG

“Die Weltmarke mit den drei Streifen”

Category: Civil Rights Lovefest
Civil Rights:
Superb
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Widely Abused

Regional Influence: Envoy

Location: The Financial District of New York

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

A Share of the Adidas AG

Population4.783 billion

CapitalBerlin
LeaderAdi Dassler
FaithBelial - Lord of Pestilence

CurrencyGold Euro
AnimalZombie Bull

The Black Holy Dominion of A Share of the Adidas AG is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Adi Dassler with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 4.783 billion Germans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Berlin. The average income tax rate is 92.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Share of the Adidas AGian economy, worth a remarkable 2,091 trillion Gold Euros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 437,250 Gold Euros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

Business meetings across the country are interrupted by the sound of squeaking whoopee-cushions, the realistic depiction of tentacles is on the core syllabus of most art schools, vaccinations are mandatory, and Adi Dassler's recent "I have a dream that we will fight them by raking muck on the beaches" speech seems a little derivative to many. Crime, especially youth-related, is a serious problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. A Share of the Adidas AG's national animal is the Zombie Bull, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Belial - Lord of Pestilence.

A Share of the Adidas AG is ranked 202,554th in the world and 3rd in The Financial District of New York for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 31,482.06 Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Nudest: 129thLargest Information Technology Sector: 570thLargest Publishing Industry: 574thRudest Citizens: 578thHighest Average Incomes: 888thLargest Insurance Industry: 1,088thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,195thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,227thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,238thSmartest Citizens: 1,271stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,613thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,646thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,809thMost Cultured: 2,040thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,095thMost Armed: 2,143rdMost Efficient Economies: 2,305thLargest Black Market: 2,378thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,458thMost Rebellious Youth: 2,993rdTop
5%
Largest Gambling Industry: 3,253rdMost Inclusive: 3,598thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,800thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,880thHighest Food Quality: 3,968thLargest Governments: 4,181stMost Developed: 4,295thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,703rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 4,850thFattest Citizens: 4,921stMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,912thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,590thMost Corrupt Governments: 6,912thHighest Average Tax Rates: 7,843rdLargest Retail Industry: 9,485thMost Patriotic: 9,983rdLargest Mining Sector: 12,277thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 12,629thHighest Economic Output: 13,085thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 13,165thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 15,300thTop
10%
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 18,372ndMost Secular: 19,196thLargest Agricultural Sector: 24,443rdMost Politically Free: 25,462ndHighest Crime Rates: 31,374th
Top
10%
Most Extensive Civil Rights: 2nd in the regionNudest: 2nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 3rd in the regionMost Devout: 3rd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 3rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, Adi Dassler's recent "I have a dream that we will fight them by raking muck on the beaches" speech seems a little derivative to many.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, vaccinations are mandatory.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, the realistic depiction of tentacles is on the core syllabus of most art schools.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, business meetings across the country are interrupted by the sound of squeaking whoopee-cushions.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, A Share of the Adidas AG's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand.
  • : A Share of the Adidas AG was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, beating enemies to death with a baseball bat is legal if done within nine innings.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, criminal rehabilitation takes place in re-education centers.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, citizens applying for their first jobs face fierce competition from the homeless.
  • : Following new legislation in A Share of the Adidas AG, there's never enough space in space.

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