by Max Barry

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The Federated Socialists States of Alfalands

“Progress, Freedom and Honor”

Category: Left-wing Utopia
Civil Rights:
Frightening
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Widely Abused

Regional Influence: Diplomat

Location: Calme Ybovien

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Alfalands

Population9.054 billion

CapitalKarahai
LeaderGeneral Secretary George Zhuan
FaithSecularism

Currencyyiling
Animalwolf

The Federated Socialists States of Alfalands is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by General Secretary George Zhuan with a fair hand, and renowned for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, unlimited-speed roads, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 9.054 billion Alfalandais are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Karahai. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Alfalandais economy, worth a remarkable 2,287 trillion yilings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 252,646 yilings, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news, polygraphs are relegated to the dungeon exhibit in castle museums, power stations shutting down at night has made bedtime reading tricky, and things are looking up for patients accidentally prescribed erectile dysfunction medication. Crime is totally unknown. Alfalands's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Secularism.

Alfalands is ranked 282,527th in the world and 29th in Calme Ybovien for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring -6.69 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Best Weather: 375thMost Compassionate Citizens: 391stNicest Citizens: 435thMost Beautiful Environments: 464thMost Inclusive: 493rdMost Pacifist: 524thLargest Welfare Programs: 590thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 641stLeast Corrupt Governments: 673rdHighest Food Quality: 677thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 706thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 741stMost Advanced Public Education: 831stHighest Average Tax Rates: 862ndMost Developed: 936thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,005thLargest Governments: 1,033rdHealthiest Citizens: 1,072ndMost Secular: 1,130thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,241stMost Rebellious Youth: 1,267thSafest: 1,392ndHighest Poor Incomes: 1,562ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,591stSmartest Citizens: 1,610thLargest Information Technology Sector: 1,944thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,992ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 2,006thMost Cheerful Citizens: 2,013thMost Cultured: 2,014thMost Efficient Economies: 2,083rdMost Extensive Civil Rights: 2,592ndTop
5%
Lowest Crime Rates: 3,875thLargest Publishing Industry: 4,385thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,431stHighest Average Incomes: 5,400thMost Valuable International Artwork: 6,364thRudest Citizens: 7,002ndHighest Economic Output: 11,608thMost Income Equality: 11,689thTop
10%
Nudest: 17,928thMost Influential: 22,280thMost Politically Free: 26,357thMost Extreme: 26,468thHighest Drug Use: 26,990th
Top
5%
Nicest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionTop
10%
Most Extensive Civil Rights: 2nd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 2nd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionMost Inclusive: 2nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, things are looking up for patients accidentally prescribed erectile dysfunction medication.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, power stations shutting down at night has made bedtime reading tricky.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, polygraphs are relegated to the dungeon exhibit in castle museums.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, the word "sexagenarian" has taken on a whole new meaning.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, national park visitors are reporting a rash of poison ivy sightings.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, the nation's taxpayers pay for foreign governments' extravagances.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, government officials sit helplessly as they are labelled 'Pompous Womples' by celebrities.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, from the highest mountain to the deepest cave - one can always count on finding a good cell signal in Alfalands.
  • : Following new legislation in Alfalands, a weakened police force struggles to maintain law and order.

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