The Socialist Federal Republic of Artoriticitys is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Müller Thermolev with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 1.097 billion Artoreans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fürthreich. The average income tax rate is 43.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Artoreanz economy, worth 149 trillion molens a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 136,461 molens, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

Things are looking up for patients accidentally prescribed erectile dysfunction medication, the fire brigade often deal with cases of burnt toast, visual acuity is worsening amongst teenagers, and politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Artoriticitys's national animal is the Artorian tigers, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is State secular.

Artoriticitys is ranked 26,025^th in the world and 1,281^st in The North Pacific for Smartest Citizens, with 52.88 quips per hour.