by Max Barry

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The Imperial Empire of Ascenon


Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Below Average
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Page

Location: The North Pacific



Population20.476 billion

FaithInfinite God Dragon

CurrencyImperial Credit
AnimalMutated Lizard-Dragon

The Imperial Empire of Ascenon is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Carrow with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 20.476 billion Ascenonians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cadia. The average income tax rate is 61.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ascenonian economy, worth a remarkable 7,502 trillion Imperial Credits a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 366,424 Imperial Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

The studies of art and philosophy are banned, brave curators do battle with disorganised government libraries, CEOs can't hear the term 'Fire Sale' without bursting into tears, and serial commas clarify the relationship between one's lackeys, the taxpayers, and kinsfolk. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ascenon's national animal is the Mutated Lizard-Dragon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Infinite God Dragon.

Ascenon is ranked 5,781st in the world and 210th in The North Pacific for Most Avoided, scoring 441.54 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.

Largest Black Market: 262ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 294thLargest Information Technology Sector: 303rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 353rdMost World Assembly Endorsements: 491stHighest Economic Output: 803rdMost Influential: 808thMost Scientifically Advanced: 957thHighest Average Incomes: 1,031stHighest Poor Incomes: 1,056thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,146thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,633rdLargest Publishing Industry: 1,986thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2,062ndTop
Rudest Citizens: 2,094thSmartest Citizens: 2,655thMost Cultured: 2,708thMost Developed: 2,812thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,185thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,302ndLargest Mining Sector: 3,370thLongest Average Lifespans: 3,672ndMost Efficient Economies: 3,959thLowest Crime Rates: 4,193rdHealthiest Citizens: 4,652ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,842ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,998thLargest Retail Industry: 5,293rdMost Advanced Public Education: 5,616thMost Avoided: 5,781stLargest Governments: 6,026thLargest Populations: 6,083rdMost Subsidized Industry: 6,987thLargest Gambling Industry: 7,644thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 7,752ndMost Secular: 9,334thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9,881stTop
Most Advanced Public Transport: 14,729thMost Inclusive: 14,953rdMost Stationary: 15,052ndMost Valuable International Artwork: 15,860thHighest Drug Use: 19,495th
Largest Black Market: 7th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 16th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 16th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 19th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 41st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 47th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 52nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 56th in the regionLargest Populations: 57th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 71st in the regionTop
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 96th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 96th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 109th in the regionRudest Citizens: 125th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 126th in the regionMost Cultured: 137th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 141st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 145th in the regionMost Developed: 159th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 170th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 189th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 204th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 208th in the regionMost Avoided: 210th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 233rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 271st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 271st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 283rd in the regionMost Influential: 290th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 291st in the regionLargest Governments: 319th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 340th in the regionMost Stationary: 345th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 356th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 362nd in the regionTop
Highest Drug Use: 460th in the regionMost Secular: 521st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 522nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 628th in the regionMost Inclusive: 866th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, serial commas clarify the relationship between one's lackeys, the taxpayers, and kinsfolk.
  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, CEOs can't hear the term 'Fire Sale' without bursting into tears.
  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, brave curators do battle with disorganised government libraries.
  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, the studies of art and philosophy are banned.
  • : Ascenon was endorsed by The Free Land of The Clever Crow.
  • : Ascenon was endorsed by The People's Democratic Empire of Sopernia.
  • : Ascenon was endorsed by The Kingdom of Riverdanes.
  • : Ascenon was endorsed by The Empire of Imperial Pieserged.
  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, the backs of 'No Trespassing' signs were made for you and me.
  • : Following new legislation in Ascenon, children as young as twelve are conscripted into the armed forces.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 259 » Calamazo, Yaorozu, Great Bights Mum, Universal State Formula, Notyoutopia, Atain, Diodone, Selfgradatude, Shadowrik, Corfad, Sunto, PlanetPunk, Territorio di Nessuno, Wineclaw, Holy Oranz, Frances Francis the First of France, Phoronu, Kwaj, Puczovska, Unimaginable Doom, Buckerino, Siwale, Shibutani, The Gamer Party, Sil Dorsett, Pallaith, New Trisone, Moubarakistan, Former English Colony, Yukti, Koda-Land, Bearical, Highton Islands, Avemterra, Maott, Zeternia, Whereisthatistan, Ethnon, Sundred, Hyperbanus, Empy, United Draconia, SORT, Cloydicia, El Fiji Grande, Xentherida, Arstungry, Kobagia, Dar es Saalam, Wilkshire, and 209 others.New Chilokver, Daiz, Greater Pittsburgh, The Iron Lions, New Pruessen, The Rhein States, The Austro Germanic Union, The Most Freedom Ever, Niradans, United Kahndaq, Malta Comino Gozo, Votak Matim, Vincone Cae, North Bratislava, Egalico, New Lakemba, The Windmilluminati, Guer Aike, Dreadton, Omnistria, Kasazzastan, Plumas, Ninjak30, Detrivania, Panama Coalition, Zumlandia, Rosewood-, Napnomadia, Valhalla123, Eri-Maqa-Ena, Abiswashyo-bhumi, Sunaiya, Pleroma Sans Romans, Pasargad, Joodey, The Sinclarian Provinces, Solmetria, Acrabinnia, Plangainer, Steampunk Ariel, Trillius, The Stratosphere Islands, Haor Chall, Soviet Terran, Astronomical, 1 very fast endotarter, Destructive Government Endorsing System, Noahs Second Country, Orado, Solidair, Astrind, Glurponia, British Pacific Islands, Loutsland, Abject Ludicrosity, Wisconsota, Runeda, The Tampa Bay Rays, New Octicarg, PotatoFarmers, McMasterdonia, Faircliff, Gnomewatchers, Fizban, Clan Spaniel, Xagill, Kranostav, Zecit, Pazair, Seenvorland, Viridiann, Dabarastan, Zyvetskistaahn, Fraguale Cothe, Ravendi, Serendipita Martia, Interdimensional Zone, Fendlium, Merconitonitopia, Newpromisedland, Misthas, Valentine Z, Praeceps, Advancia-Sizzletown, Volstokn, Loli County, Cobleck Weleis, Austral States of America, Makersaulache, Townbolia, New Avian, Hamerica, Yokciq Empire, Wit Noreis, Woodsend, The New Communist Republic Of States, MiaryBhalzhack, The Endless Eventide, New Jamgra, Vivanco, Eschatosia, KhalChicken, Olofin, Ihese, SherpDaWerp in TNP, The Lancerian Empire, Prevaland, Crader, Xyrron, Antiyard, Avastate, Alandorria, Nistriabar, East Akra, Zokk, Varola, Supreme Leader Hadrian, The United Capital of Adam, Unshleepd, Nisastria, Hyphen, Fluffy Noodles, Nationeer, The Pantheons, Korovan Isles, Westinor, Solskjar, Zemnaya Svoboda, The Serdey Islands, Fauzjhia, Mesopotama, The Democratic Kingdom Of Skaraborg, Frostcell, Sikol, Saperisole, Zzozona, Qetrela, I Like Killing people, Fox Richy, Termathe, Prydania, Libertania Democratica, Shinjuku tokyo 0, The Calabash Protectorate, Kocherian, Tukayyiad, Asoc lon, Maynilan, Ihsan, Smesh, Cowbridge, Seanat, Brucklania, Innocentic, Arichia, Eywaan, Schnuftelland, Maclare, Madjack, Simone Republic, Kragsgale, Xipher, Buckhem, Astal Aavors, Amerian States, Illusia and Neverendia, Principia Mathematica, Ultra777, Erubetia, Pigeonstan, Andexia, Animu Place, U S Eh, Great Vritania, Neu-Galicia, Democratic Republic of Kohland, Heilhum Imperius, Basedania, Free Nation of Hong Kong, The Unicrons, Harjad, Therizia, Frahnkzaden, Aerilia, Cretox State, Morover, Nouvelle-Floride, TLTland, Amprak, Yalkan, Lulubellia, Glanst, Unsophisticate, West Papua states, Comfed, Outer Shenendoah, The Kingdom Of Wagies, Chips and Guac, Elvoreto, Navsland, Magna Banitia, Rozarus, Hardscrabble, Abonland, Porotia, Imperial Pieserged, Riverdanes, Sopernia, and The Clever Crow.

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