by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Regular Customer of Barristaland

“We're in the caffeine delivery & addiction business!” Chai Grande

Category: Anarchy
Civil Rights:
Superb
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Squire

Location: The Peaceful Coffee Shop In Chicago

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Barristaland

Population4.488 billion

CapitalCappuccino Central
LeaderChai Grande
FaithCaffeine

CurrencyBean
AnimalBatty Biscotti

The Regular Customer of Barristaland is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Chai Grande with a fair hand, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, smutty television, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 4.488 billion Barristas live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cappuccino Central. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 64.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Caffeinated economy, worth 900 trillion Beans a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 200,637 Beans, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 703,984 per year while the poor average 41,480, a ratio of 17.0 to 1.

Parents dread their examinations more than their children, defense lawyers suggestively note to juries how flagrantly happy victims were, the government has seized the means of recreation, and selfie stick use is a required Scout badge. Crime, especially youth-related, is a serious problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Barristaland's national animal is the Batty Biscotti, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Caffeine.

Barristaland is ranked 1,020th in the world and 1st in The Peaceful Coffee Shop In Chicago for Rudest Citizens, with 304.15 Insults Per Minute.

Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 1,020thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,190thTop
5%
Fattest Citizens: 2,546thLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,658thLargest Retail Industry: 3,287thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,324thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,433rdMost Efficient Economies: 3,467thLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,003rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 4,843rdMost Subsidized Industry: 5,164thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 5,853rdHighest Average Incomes: 6,214thMost Cheerful Citizens: 6,386thLargest Publishing Industry: 6,490thLargest Black Market: 6,868thMost Avoided: 7,297thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 7,546thSmartest Citizens: 8,148thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 10,227thMost Secular: 10,376thMost Cultured: 10,796thTop
10%
Nudest: 11,281stMost Valuable International Artwork: 11,299thMost Armed: 11,839thMost Advanced Public Education: 14,305thLargest Governments: 14,619thHighest Disposable Incomes: 14,704thHighest Drug Use: 16,457thMost Inclusive: 16,965thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 17,696thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 18,280thHighest Economic Output: 19,004thHighest Crime Rates: 20,618th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, selfie stick use is a required Scout badge.
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, the government has seized the means of recreation.
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, defense lawyers suggestively note to juries how flagrantly happy victims were.
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, parents dread their examinations more than their children.
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, bored politicians often entertain themselves with games of Simon during important votes.
  • : Barristaland lodged a message on the The Peaceful Coffee Shop In Chicago Regional Message Board.
  • : Barristaland was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Soda Pop Sector.
  • : Barristaland lodged a message on the The Peaceful Coffee Shop In Chicago Regional Message Board.
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, citizens are bleary-eyed after staying up all night with a good book (Barristaland has found 4 easter eggs).
  • : Following new legislation in Barristaland, Bigtopian relations have become a minefield.

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