by Max Barry

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The Burman Kakistocracy of Basementees

“The Eggs, We Demand More”

Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Average
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Truckler

Location: Pax Britannia

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Basementees

Population19.731 billion

CapitalNovus Damascus
LeaderOđinnshrafn Khagan Numerian IV Drake
FaithNahuatl

CurrencyRuncible
AnimalUrsine Phoenix

The Burman Kakistocracy of Basementees is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Ođinnshrafn Khagan Numerian IV Drake with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, otherworldly petting zoo, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 19.731 billion Thu'uls are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Novus Damascus. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient K't Hu'ul economy, worth an astonishing 14,284 trillion Runcibles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 723,958 Runcibles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Atheist missionaries spread doubt overseas, construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway, fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers, and holidaymakers sleep curled up on the floor as hotel beds are replaced with oversized bookcases. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Basementees's national animal is the Ursine Phoenix, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Nahuatl.

Basementees is ranked 4,122nd in the world and 5th in Pax Britannia for Largest Soda Pop Sector, scoring 8,709.57 on the Addison-Fukk Productivity Rating.

Top
1%
Highest Poor Incomes: 12thLargest Information Technology Sector: 22ndMost Subsidized Industry: 29thLargest Black Market: 32ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 40thMost Scientifically Advanced: 56thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 59thHighest Average Incomes: 70thMost Advanced Public Education: 95thMost Corrupt Governments: 96thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 109thLargest Mining Sector: 130thMost Efficient Economies: 142ndLargest Agricultural Sector: 153rdLowest Crime Rates: 161stLargest Governments: 174thHighest Economic Output: 185thSmartest Citizens: 222ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 228thHighest Average Tax Rates: 260thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 283rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 329thLargest Insurance Industry: 506thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 519thMost Developed: 533rdLongest Average Lifespans: 608thMost Avoided: 654thMost Secular: 657thLargest Welfare Programs: 727thRudest Citizens: 1,738thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,881stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,910thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,953rdTop
5%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 2,422ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,451stLargest Publishing Industry: 2,864thMost Inclusive: 2,881stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3,675thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,883rdLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4,122ndMost Cultured: 5,438thLargest Retail Industry: 5,936thLargest Populations: 6,742ndHealthiest Citizens: 8,214thTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 12,346thMost Influential: 15,211th
Top
5%
Highest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Most Secular: 3rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4th in the regionMost Avoided: 4th in the regionNudest: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 4th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, holidaymakers sleep curled up on the floor as hotel beds are replaced with oversized bookcases.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, atheist missionaries spread doubt overseas.
  • : Basementees rejected a request from Northern Argaen Trade Organization for an embassy with Pax Britannia.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, colonial citizens are forced to sing the praise of the "Great K't Hu'ul Liberator".
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, hundreds of subterranean tunnels are being built as part of "Project Morlock".
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, one tree's worth of paperwork accompanies each imported log of timber.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, citizens are now allowed to discuss whether Ođinnshrafn Khagan Numerian IV Drake is the greatest ruler ever or simply the greatest ruler of this generation.
  • : Following new legislation in Basementees, all major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras.

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 3 » Ancient Free and Accepted Masons, Arrstotzka, and Maplestan.

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