by Max Barry

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The Free Bears of Bears Armed

Bears Armed was Commended by Security Council Resolution # 124

“Do we WHAT in the woods?”

Category: Civil Rights Lovefest
Civil Rights:
Superb
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Excessive

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: International Democratic Union

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Bears Armed

Population33.868 billion

CapitalCouncil Groves
LeaderChairbear of the High Council
FaithOne Plus Seven

Currencygolden thaler
Animalgoldilocks

The Free Bears of Bears Armed is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Chairbear of the High Council with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 33.868 billion Bears hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The minute, outspoken government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Council Groves. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Urrsish economy, worth an astonishing 11,968 trillion golden thalers a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Soda Sales, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 353,371 golden thalers, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,187,969 per year while the poor average 77,941, a ratio of 15.2 to 1.

Chairbear of the High Council is spearheading a new fashion trend of wearing swimming goggles and medieval armour, Chairbear of the High Council is adamant that ponies aren't just for little girls, park rangers struggle to deal with a rash of stolen pic-a-nic baskets, and tourists flock from around the world to see Bears Armed's famed 'rainbow slums'. Crime is totally unknown. Bears Armed's national animal is the goldilocks, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is One Plus Seven.

Bears Armed is ranked 230,221st in the world and 106th in International Democratic Union for Most Income Equality, scoring 6.56 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.

Top
1%
Most Cultured: 8thMost Cheerful Citizens: 100thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 114thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 121stHighest Food Quality: 177thLargest Publishing Industry: 237thMost Primitive: 344thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 393rdHighest Economic Output: 415thHighest Disposable Incomes: 417thMost Valuable International Artwork: 440thMost Devout: 479thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 503rdRudest Citizens: 513thLargest Agricultural Sector: 598thMost Efficient Economies: 640thMost Beautiful Environments: 668thLargest Gambling Industry: 811thMost Rebellious Youth: 887thHighest Average Incomes: 1,441stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,477thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,536thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,578thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,578thLargest Populations: 1,989thSmartest Citizens: 2,296thTop
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3,335thLargest Retail Industry: 5,624thMost Subsidized Industry: 8,645thMost Inclusive: 9,959thMost Advanced Public Education: 10,606thLargest Governments: 11,332ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 11,474thMost Armed: 11,745thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 12,061stNicest Citizens: 13,603rdTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 18,066thHighest Poor Incomes: 20,370thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 22,263rdMost Politically Free: 22,507thHighest Drug Use: 22,615th
Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 2nd in the regionHighest Food Quality: 2nd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2nd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 3rd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 3rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Free: 4th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 5th in the regionLargest Populations: 5th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Drug Use: 7th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 7th in the regionMost Armed: 8th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 9th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 11th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, tourists flock from around the world to see Bears Armed's famed 'rainbow slums'.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, park rangers struggle to deal with a rash of stolen pic-a-nic baskets.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, Chairbear of the High Council is adamant that ponies aren't just for little girls.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, Chairbear of the High Council is spearheading a new fashion trend of wearing swimming goggles and medieval armour.
  • : Bears Armed was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Nicest Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, students who refuse to pray are expelled from school.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, prisoners have been known to host cooking and home décor television shows.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, the nation refuses to discard its increasingly useless penny.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, you need two tenors and a coloratura contralto to sing the national anthem properly.
  • : Following new legislation in Bears Armed, restaurants are required to specify whether their toilet paper was made in Bears Armed.

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