The United Socialist States of Bedsonya is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Biggus Dickus with an even hand, and notable for its ban on automobiles, hatred of cheese, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate population of 2.839 billion Bedsonyans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nostaw. The average income tax rate is 95.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Bedsonyan economy, worth 371 trillion Dollarbucks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 130,946 Dollarbucks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Lavish state dinners in Nostaw are the state's leading budgetary expenditure, the countryside is shrouded by wind farms, the intelligence community is playing 4-D chess with an imaginary spy network, and engineers preemptively order lawyers after every power cut. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bedsonya's national animal is the Plapitypuss, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Bedsonya is ranked 300,375^th in the world and 5,408^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -303.52 on the Scary Big Number Scale.