by Max Barry

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The Satanic Empire of Big Jim P

“Hell knows what Heaven only suspects. Hail Satan.” Lord Jim the Dark

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Hatchling

Location: Osiris


Big Jim P

Population35.346 billion

CapitalBig Jim P City
LeaderLord Jim the Dark

AnimalBlack Goat of the Wood

The Satanic Empire of Big Jim P is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Lord Jim the Dark with an iron fist, and remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, public floggings, and strictly enforced bedtime. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 35.346 billion Big Jim Pians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The tiny, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order and Industry also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Spirituality aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Big Jim P City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Big Jim Pian economy, worth an astonishing 12,021 trillion Bhaals a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Information Technology. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 340,120 Bhaals, with the richest citizens earning 5.7 times as much as the poorest.

It's best to decline if Lord Jim the Dark offers to buy a round of drinks, there have been reports of people marrying housepets, fast-food chefs regularly win Health Innovation Awards for spitting on burgers, and historical commemorations regularly devolve into militaristic jingoism. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Big Jim P's national animal is the Black Goat of the Wood, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Satanism.

Big Jim P is ranked 2,292nd in the world and 82nd in Osiris for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 23,717.5 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 212thHighest Economic Output: 224thHighest Disposable Incomes: 409thLargest Mining Sector: 414thLargest Populations: 414thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 589thLargest Gambling Industry: 619thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 688thFattest Citizens: 940thHighest Average Incomes: 1,051stLargest Black Market: 1,210thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,515thLargest Insurance Industry: 1,555thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,625thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,660thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,660thTop
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,803rdMost Efficient Economies: 1,837thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,853rdMost Influential: 1,876thMost Avoided: 2,097thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,204thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,278thLargest Publishing Industry: 2,292ndRudest Citizens: 2,886thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,898thLargest Retail Industry: 3,504thSmartest Citizens: 3,720thMost Corrupt Governments: 3,880thHighest Poor Incomes: 4,391stLargest Agricultural Sector: 4,428thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4,453rdMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 4,483rdHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 5,638thLargest Governments: 6,113thTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 8,975thLargest Information Technology Sector: 9,949thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 12,415thMost Secular: 12,746thNudest: 13,016thMost Armed: 16,033rd
Highest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Populations: 7th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 12th in the regionMost Influential: 16th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 18th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 20th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 25th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 27th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 34th in the regionFattest Citizens: 35th in the regionLargest Black Market: 65th in the regionTop
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 72nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 73rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 81st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 82nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 89th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 89th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 98th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 100th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 102nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 110th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 112th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 124th in the regionMost Avoided: 128th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 136th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 185th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 191st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 192nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 193rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 212th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 242nd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 275th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 287th in the regionLargest Governments: 292nd in the regionTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 460th in the regionNudest: 531st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 534th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 560th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 657th in the regionMost Armed: 665th in the regionMost Secular: 666th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Big Jim P's influence in Osiris rose from "Unproven" to "Hatchling".
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry.
  • : Big Jim P's influence in Osiris rose from "Zero" to "Unproven".
  • : Big Jim P was refounded in Osiris.
  • : Big Jim P ceased to exist in Hell.
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector.
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector.
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most World Assembly Endorsements.
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Insurance Industry.
  • : Big Jim P was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector.


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