by Max Barry

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The Please Don't Open That of Bleakfoot

“Outfangthief is Damgudthyng”

Category: Scandinavian Liberal Paradise
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Squire

Location: the South Pacific



Population3.06 billion

LeaderGovernor Laithwaite Canker
FaithNot opening things

Animallong pig

The Please Don't Open That of Bleakfoot is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Governor Laithwaite Canker with an even hand, and renowned for its irreverence towards religion, hatred of cheese, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cheerful population of 3.06 billion Bleakfeet enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Winterharbour. The average income tax rate is 98.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Bleakfeese economy, worth 497 trillion honks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 162,678 honks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Libraries are now installed with jacuzzis and mini-bars, prime real estate is devoted to wind farms and solar energy generators, the new intercity submarine SSN Long Pig Warrior instills terror in claustrophobic travellers, and judicial robes are the country's hottest fashion trend. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bleakfoot's national animal is the long pig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Not opening things.

Bleakfoot is ranked 1,835th in the world and 55th in the South Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 3,472.97 Pounds Of Wildlife Per Square Mile.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 254thMost Influential: 497thMost Pacifist: 743rdMost Compassionate Citizens: 839thNicest Citizens: 867thLargest Welfare Programs: 1,063rdMost Inclusive: 1,129thBest Weather: 1,184thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,295thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,350thMost Developed: 1,410thMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,562ndHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1,631stHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,738thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,760thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,769thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,793rdMost Beautiful Environments: 1,835thHealthiest Citizens: 1,965thSafest: 2,106thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,232ndTop
Largest Governments: 3,206thLeast Corrupt Governments: 3,215thLowest Crime Rates: 3,444thSmartest Citizens: 3,627thHighest Poor Incomes: 3,936thMost Secular: 3,955thMost Cultured: 5,692ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 6,001stLargest Publishing Industry: 9,046thLargest Information Technology Sector: 9,418thMost Income Equality: 10,225thMost Efficient Economies: 11,368thHighest Average Incomes: 11,697thTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 13,314thMost Scientifically Advanced: 17,107th
Most Pacifist: 22nd in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 26th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 28th in the regionNicest Citizens: 29th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 29th in the regionMost Influential: 32nd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 33rd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 41st in the regionMost Inclusive: 44th in the regionBest Weather: 44th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 44th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 48th in the regionMost Developed: 48th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 49th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 50th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 55th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 57th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 61st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 65th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 68th in the regionSafest: 72nd in the regionTop
Largest Governments: 90th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 100th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 108th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 113th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 115th in the regionMost Secular: 129th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 131st in the regionMost Cultured: 166th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 236th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 284th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 345th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 354th in the regionTop
Nudest: 406th in the regionMost Income Equality: 427th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 476th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 495th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 698th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 793rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 384 » Aumeltopia, Qvait, Erinor, Yeldarbsland, Mapico, Amerion, Hanguk-Nippon, Aidenfieeld, Land Without Shrimp, Wehraboos, Tsunamy, Crystal Creation, Volaworand, Nova Montron, Si-topia, Jehenna, Curlyhoward, Japanese Federal Republic, Nowa Europa, Tsvetania, Kiasu-ism, The West Valley Mountains, Isokenzar, Outer Utonixick Gollinican, Sthalrim, New Briantown, Darakin, Stoniamera, Dankstergrad, Cuuldere, Fighting Kawi Ninja, USNE2018, Centristvill, Seliyan progressive Islands, Theorin, Noire Denholm, Kholdan, North Catimestistrianes, The United Expanse, Escevola, Rebel-topia, Native Inhabitants of Antarctica, PenguinPies, Drystar, North Kanuckistan, Maeiland, Zaelith, Sedunn, Direwolf1, HUElavia, and 334 others.The Two Jerseys, Bumblegaria, The naked people, Corgitopiaa, Spazzhole, Southern Numenor, Xandev, Walloonia, Salguod, Soem, Baltenlands, Ancient Slobovia, Center Lisle, Pamela And Hepatitis, Linden Oak, Grianal, Privatore, Three Rivia Levr, Zosnor, Madhonia, Yellunstryer, Dereistic, Unielvan Millorvium, Antarctic Empires, Blaash, Gymnostan, Doraya, Cypheri, Oreo States, Potion Seller, St Oaks, Pax Dracon, Fasire, Utondara, The Worst army of, RestartAll, Avalonica, Aurcania, Rad Asia, A leftover country, Wese Zippopiteradgil, Eastern Nyan, Lesinteil, Fredriecan, Los Lonley Boys, Farengeto, Calistan, 073 039 109 032 080 111 112 112 121, Beepee, FreeFishers, The Filippinas, Enplatia, GI-Land, Herbert Island, Bod Wareenaland, Tioloman, Tiransia, Bergenu, The Solar System Scope, Shefino, Doundaly, Terran Draconia, Kroumos, Iym Winterless, Bawkie, Kandorith, Techganet, Steampunk Engineers, Quinta Caporales, South Blossom, Gentea, Moreana, Ebonhand, Kringalia, Indolos, Farelonia, West Pastafaria, Page 53, InnWorm, Springhollow, Anserisa, Weryalachiressaraxiatopia, Turks of The Eastern Calculus, Ralphburg, Yavemaya, Bohenia, United Irradiated Impact Craters, The SpaceNeo-Goryeo Etymological Society, Vardanfel, Dukin Donuts, Seyja, Holy Free, Icn Gaurath, Maerist, Quh, Hong Kong Kowloon and New Territories, Compli, Marinho Islands, Dis7Nation, Itani, Maximvs Tarvgvs Rex, Markla, Gonrati, Auphelia, Laamiva, The Northeast Mashriq, Not Austria, Republik Hintonia, Pi Ttamgwa Nunmul, Blondiesland, Kucaland, Aschenburg, The Drakan Republic, Valdutz, Saint Cinder, Drew-Topia, Myness, Sandaoguo, Rectionk, Idiono, Storalia, Drugged Monkeys, Hakk Fiss, Myndia, Greater Dalarestan, Trotkys paradise, Midand, Concrete Slab, Andinla, Monstrous Island, Aresten, House Ahsanul, Aoz, Western Fardelshufflestein, Treesil, Royaltica, Guvnurag, Galactic Gelatin, Kelle Sondians, Tepertopia, Brunier, Isle of Glastonbury, Proctethia, Phanama, Menesynchro, Filistinia, Steviland, Canmore, SteamPunk Squirrels, Bartonia Nova, South Caleblan, Purple Hyacinth, Seythennia, Fronern, Western Calypso Islands, Vanbella, Lantzalot, Eskvenn, Berlana, Myhomecountry, Sapientiano, Los Rodeos, WI SD EA D, Abyssal Phantasm, Rabbitz, Belschaft, Apartment 11F, Rotenaplistan, East Mantis, Martzian, Tughampton, Xergiokia, Wakandan Tribes, Kingpins, The Imperial Frost Federation, Manuck, Armonitopia, Yahshabbat, Hisal, Roterdamia, The Founding Citadel, Rosdrikk, Blaufrankisch, Ceutalia, Hermela, Holota, Lionstrapower, Treir, The White Isles, Lugentzdort, Playing Pianos Filled With Flames, SHAYTAN UKHIROSS, Margila Islands, Synarion, HORLALEK, Britun, Mauricean Islands, Gidonia, Scu Greinne, Malonlandia, Wallechi, Truskawkoland, Euro Pacifica, Unojo, Doge Land, Centia Deran, Neten Land, Levistian, Kantahania, New Itomorii, Qawe, East Nagaland, LadyRebels, WeedCocaineDrugs, Yuveska, Of Cheddar, The Altan, Freavia, Yeses, Banglazstrogaria, The Imperial Of Notsep, The 3rdGodKing, Lyland, Xenianianopia, Shuckle Empire, Ottawa land, Nelize, The Figiyastoplana, Eddonia, Pencil Sharpeners 2, Borielo, Rubelios, New Qafedemar, Arvan Irawer, Depressed Nation, Bichedder, The Stolen Lands, River Fork, The ColdWyvernian Undead, Ipugao, Greater Scottdascoda, NIGHTRAY, New Belgrade, Eternal Memedom, Amphibians, Carrelie, Libedistan, Mangolya, Kukulandistan, Westenhald, Bod Zarth Throge, Anarkiopia, Weissmans, Erfton, Noimosini, Eashenn, Anatasha, Eutraya, Skaladoria, Sunsland, Amsterdam VIII, Twoole, The United Australian States, Populaa, Pagrosse, Flaksis, Drugged up Kitties, Oxyliteral, Corumdema, Oano, Alambar, Arizona2, The island of Sorna, Hawaiian Pizzas, Democratic Region, Vexyn, Conservative Freedom Fighters, Kit Bit VIII, United States of Belvaria, Terravainia, Daal Chawwal, Breizlovakia, Ceauliga, Ligeglad, Fendezia, Anatomic, Kaoia, Freedoom, Sodor and Mann, JavaSiege, Dalegreen, Kiani, Xarbraden, Coneiconia, Rhetiaa, Karesea, Beblahbleblo, Ragabania, Paganan, Peoples Republic of TempleLandia, Kaleidescooptopia, Jorstone, Wanoria, Podunkia, Daniels Hall, Tyflugian, Neazland, Alsundrium, Astiaveth, Bosumtwi, Sokratis Constantine, Solanosco, North Prarie, Tierra del Rey Carlos, Agletgreenia, Saint Horror, Merevane, Eastern Mekong, Dragolif, Bundeskara, North Lunch, Silver Aton, Colsuluff, Green Sofia, Independent State of Arstotzka, Greysoria, Omonoia, Sozlanden, Northern Cambridge, Tackastan, Iningo, New Sanet, Cladonia, and Galebland.

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