The Let Me Cook Central of Boston Bagels is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Jayson Tatum with an iron fist, and remarkable for its digital currency, strictly enforced bedtime, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-working, cynical population of 3.122 billion Boston Bagelsians enjoy great individual freedoms in everything except elections, which, where they exist at all, are populist shams for a dictatorship government that has no intention of ever giving up power.

The tiny government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Boston. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Boston Bagelsian economy, worth 351 trillion Bagels a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Gambling. Average income is an impressive 112,701 Bagels, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Calvinball players are lost for days as they wander the vast halls of their new academies, Jayson Tatum has just been declared ruler of Boston Bagels in an international press conference, Bagelism has been named as Boston Bagels's national religion, and one can walk from one side of Boston to the other without setting foot on Boston Bagelsian soil. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low. Boston Bagels's national animal is the Bagel, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Bagelism.

Boston Bagels is ranked 6,654^th in the world and 474^th in Osiris for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 102,896.29 Standard Monetary Units.