by Max Barry

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The Holy Empire of BrightonBurg

“Orbis terrarum nostri est(The world is ours)” Kaiser Janos II

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Powerbroker

Location: One big Island



Population35.155 billion

CapitalGreater Brightonburg City
LeaderKaiser Janos II
FaithOrange Catholic

CurrencyGold or Silver Krona
AnimalWild Boar

The Holy Empire of BrightonBurg is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Kaiser Janos II with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, avowedly heterosexual populace, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 35.155 billion BrightonBurgians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Greater Brightonburg City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient BrightonBurgian economy, worth an astonishing 16,600 trillion Gold or Silver Kronor a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is an amazing 472,210 Gold or Silver Kronor, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,416,630 per year while the poor average 122,946, a ratio of 11.5 to 1.

It is illegal to have the wrong clock time showing on your microwave oven, government bureaucrats spend six hours per day justifying a six-hour workday, the government terminates employment with extreme prejudice, and police officers catch up on their paperwork while handing their caseload to PIs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. BrightonBurg's national animal is the Wild Boar, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Orange Catholic.

BrightonBurg is ranked 154,833rd in the world and 45th in One big Island for Most Pacifist, with 1.88 Cheeks Turned Per Day.

Largest Mining Sector: 22ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 28thLargest Insurance Industry: 32ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 49thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 61stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 63rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 66thFattest Citizens: 73rdMost Devout: 86thMost Avoided: 87thMost Ignorant Citizens: 93rdHighest Economic Output: 94thMost Primitive: 102ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 109thLargest Retail Industry: 121stHighest Disposable Incomes: 127thMost Corrupt Governments: 161stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 275thHighest Average Incomes: 303rdMost Efficient Economies: 318thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 351stLargest Populations: 414thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 595thLargest Agricultural Sector: 705thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 926thRudest Citizens: 1,135thLargest Black Market: 1,348thTop
Most Armed: 2,740thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,915thMost Influential: 5,024thHighest Poor Incomes: 5,443rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,372ndTop
Most Conservative: 12,370thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 15,251st
Highest Economic Output: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 2nd in the regionTop
Most Conservative: 4th in the regionMost Armed: 4th in the region

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