by Max Barry

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The Guy Who Got Zero Votes of Briteannia

“Ah. Guess I wasn't competent enough.” King George V

Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Below Average
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: the South Pacific

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Briteannia

Population1.438 billion

CapitalBig Ben
LeaderKing George V
FaithVampireism

Currencycup'o'tea
Animalblue-eyed falcon

The Guy Who Got Zero Votes of Briteannia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by King George V with an iron fist, and remarkable for its prohibition of alcohol, state-planned economy, and digital currency. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 1.438 billion Briteash are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Big Ben. The average income tax rate is 54.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Brit economy, worth 189 trillion cup'o'teas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 131,984 cup'o'teas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Dozens of viewers go online to hear whether a comma has been added to Clause 5 in Subsection B of Law 58375, politicians "baring all" for the camera isn't always a figure of speech, an underground movement of cigarette smokers has sprung up in response to a government ban, and the nation's new foreign policy of 'very disproportionate retribution' has its neighbors on edge. Crime is totally unknown. Briteannia's national animal is the blue-eyed falcon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Vampireism.

Briteannia is ranked 176,464th in the world and 6,727th in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 47.56 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

Top
5%
Most Secular: 2,499thMost Valuable International Artwork: 3,654thMost Influential: 3,716thLargest Insurance Industry: 7,201stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7,948thHighest Poor Incomes: 8,911thLargest Mining Sector: 9,795thTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 10,951stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 11,727thLargest Retail Industry: 12,616thHealthiest Citizens: 13,268thLargest Black Market: 13,391stLongest Average Lifespans: 14,291stMost Developed: 15,488thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 16,057thMost Rebellious Youth: 16,417thMost Corrupt Governments: 16,821stLargest Information Technology Sector: 17,855thHighest Average Incomes: 18,098thMost Advanced Public Education: 18,953rd
Top
5%
Most Secular: 105th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 124th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 206th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 248th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 250th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 269th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 299th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 369th in the regionLargest Black Market: 376th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Retail Industry: 419th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 423rd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 433rd in the regionMost Influential: 443rd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 446th in the regionMost Developed: 450th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 524th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 537th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 549th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 568th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 588th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 596th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 615th in the regionMost Cultured: 638th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 640th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 672nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 708th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 732nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, the nation's new foreign policy of 'very disproportionate retribution' has its neighbors on edge.
  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, an underground movement of cigarette smokers has sprung up in response to a government ban.
  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, politicians "baring all" for the camera isn't always a figure of speech.
  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, dozens of viewers go online to hear whether a comma has been added to Clause 5 in Subsection B of Law 58375.
  • : Briteannia altered its national flag.
  • : Briteannia lodged a message on the The South Pacific Regional Message Board.
  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, hordes of tourists are ruining the environment.
  • : Briteannia was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Corrupt Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Briteannia, scientists earn more grant money for reproducing old experiments than trying anything new.
  • : Briteannia resigned from the World Assembly.

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