The United Confederacy of Canineia is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by King Fluffy with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, infamous sell-swords, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.653 billion Canineians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Canidae Harbour. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 44.4%.

The thriving Canineian economy, worth 92.3 trillion Caners a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 55,824 Caners, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

Strip mining of rare earth metals is up while back problems are down, tourists are denied entry because of a distant relative married to a Lilliputian, the military is slashing spending on conventional arms and diverting it to spending on prosthetic arms, and employers may fire workers without giving any reason. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Canineia's national animal is the Canine, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Nationalism.

Canineia is ranked 199,498^th in the world and 7,335^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -108.17 on the Scary Big Number Scale.