The United Empire of Caraani is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Caranaar XVII with a fair hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and parental licensing program. The compassionate, democratic population of 21.7 billion Caraani love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Epistylium. The average income tax rate is 98.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Caraani economy, worth a remarkable 3,802 trillion Ryūs a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 175,208 Ryūs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The best way to be heard in politics is to speak softly and carry a big comedy prop, the nation's arms dealers guarantee discretion and untraceable transactions, bank robbers always set aside 50% of the loot to pay off the judge, and stockbrokers dream of getting rich by writing textbooks. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Caraani's national animal is the Carpathian Dragon, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Caraani is ranked 4,731^st in the world and 279^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 117.8 law-abiding acts per hour.