The Society of Card Gardens is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Giovanniland with an even hand, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, compulsory gun ownership, and stringent health and safety legislation. The quiet, industrious population of 10.082 billion Gardeners are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of World Collection Center. The average income tax rate is 56.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gardener economy, worth a remarkable 1,013 trillion Cards a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 100,526 Cards, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Election results are often delayed for weeks to count the expat votes, nothing gets the party jumping like Giovanniland specifying how high, people boast about their low income on their dating profiles, and hordes of unemployed lumberjacks have resorted to cutting down utility poles to satisfy their cravings. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Card Gardens's national animal is the Gardens, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Card Farming.

Card Gardens is ranked 118,869^th in the world and 6^th in Card Gardens for Nudest, with 153.75 cheeks per square mile.