by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Republic of Card Island

“Do you have a card?”

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Rare
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Page

Location: The grimy backyard of Bigej

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Card Island

Population6.743 billion

CurrencyPound
AnimalSand Pancake Lizard

The Republic of Card Island is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its disturbing lack of elderly people, zero percent divorce rate, and compulsory gun ownership. The cynical, devout population of 6.743 billion Card Islandians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 51.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Card Islandian economy, worth 887 trillion Pounds a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 131,657 Pounds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Schoolchildren must pass a six-month Ethics and Safety Committee Assessment before they are allowed to mix baking soda and vinegar, throwing garbage out of your house's front window makes it legally someone else's problem, the government spends more on chasing distant comets than on basic infrastructure, and immersive video game experiences are interrupted by incessant disclaimer pop-ups. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Card Island's national animal is the Sand Pancake Lizard, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Card Island is ranked 127,289th in the world and 320th in The grimy backyard of Bigej for Most Stationary, with 266.06085055428 days.

Top
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 7,517thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 10,299thMost Armed: 10,793rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 14,685thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 14,738thTop
10%
Best Weather: 16,911thHealthiest Citizens: 22,045thHighest Poor Incomes: 22,230thMost Patriotic: 23,735thLargest Black Market: 24,622ndHighest Disposable Incomes: 25,195thMost Devout: 26,577thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 27,531stLargest Information Technology Sector: 28,741stLowest Crime Rates: 28,931stMost Scientifically Advanced: 29,002nd
Top
5%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 24th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 34th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 35th in the regionBest Weather: 39th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, immersive video game experiences are interrupted by incessant disclaimer pop-ups.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, the government spends more on chasing distant comets than on basic infrastructure.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, throwing garbage out of your house's front window makes it legally someone else's problem.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, schoolchildren must pass a six-month Ethics and Safety Committee Assessment before they are allowed to mix baking soda and vinegar.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, citizens tint their front windows to avoid starring in the 'TV Detector Patrol Unit' documentary.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, drunk drivers are sent to rehabilitation paid for by the government.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, the Card Islandian Intelligence Agency has put 'Project Quantum Refrigerator' on hold indefinitely.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, the nation's soldiers often believe they're in the Air Force.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, people's charity begins and ends at home.
  • : Following new legislation in Card Island, a weakened police force struggles to maintain law and order.

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