The Free Land of Celtica Free State is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Cu na Celtica with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, daily referendums, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 17.304 billion Celtics are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Black Pool. The average income tax rate is 82.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Celtican economy, worth a remarkable 1,912 trillion Erins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. Average income is an impressive 110,515 Erins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, posters on 'Celtican Values' advise against being proud of Celtica Free State, private clinics eagerly advertise their trivial specialties, and the education system is being cleansed of all corporate influence. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Celtica Free State's national animal is the Hound, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Celtica Free State is ranked 17,071^st in the world and 328^th in the Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 92.21 law-abiding acts per hour.