by Max Barry

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Spotlight on:

National Flag

The Republic of Central Protectorate of Alkoholi

“Nations are led through people, leaders, and vodka”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Powerbroker

Location: Datanet


Central Protectorate of Alkoholi

Population1.239 billion

CapitalMaa humalassa vapaassa kotona
LeaderNikolas Koskinen


The Republic of Central Protectorate of Alkoholi is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Nikolas Koskinen with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, public floggings, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 1.239 billion Alkoholians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Maa humalassa vapaassa kotona. The average income tax rate is 43.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Alkoholian economy, worth 154 trillion Kronor a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 124,487 Kronor, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The national guard is mobilized whenever a mother gets separated from her child at the mall, therapists dispense hugs for heroin dealers and cuddles for crackheads, roads are often attended by round-the-clock construction crews, and Members of Parliament operate under a PAYE scheme. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Central Protectorate of Alkoholi's national animal is the Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Secularism.

Central Protectorate of Alkoholi is ranked 20,096th in the world and 5th in Datanet for Most Popular Tourist Destinations, with 1,376.24 Tourists Per Hour.

Largest Cheese Export Sector: 3,445thLargest Agricultural Sector: 6,254thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 7,286thLargest Publishing Industry: 10,426thTop
Highest Poor Incomes: 12,626thMost Developed: 13,873rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 14,750thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 15,652ndMost World Assembly Endorsements: 15,896thNicest Citizens: 17,584thMost Compassionate Citizens: 18,417thMost Secular: 18,880thSmartest Citizens: 18,968thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 19,300thLargest Information Technology Sector: 19,507thMost Rebellious Youth: 19,513thLongest Average Lifespans: 19,516thMost Scientifically Advanced: 19,719thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 20,096thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 20,139thHealthiest Citizens: 20,546thMost Inclusive: 20,692ndHighest Average Incomes: 20,894thMost Cheerful Citizens: 21,355thBest Weather: 21,647thMost Efficient Economies: 21,657th
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 1 » United Sol Federation.

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