by Max Barry

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The Free Land of Chris Hall

“Pay me or DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Outlawed
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: the Rejected Realms

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Chris Hall

Population28.882 billion

CapitalWherever the Squish-lord lives
LeaderThe Squish-lord
FaithMoney Money Money

Currencymoney is redundant
Animalfree man

The Free Land of Chris Hall is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Squish-lord with an iron fist, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, enslaved workforce, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 28.882 billion Chris Hallians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Law & Order is also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wherever the Squish-lord lives. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Chris Hallian economy, worth an astonishing 22,674 trillion money is redundants a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Gambling, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. Average income is a breathtaking 785,087 money is redundants, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 5,611,363 per year while the poor average 35,934, a ratio of 156 to 1.

University graduates and new home-owners toil in labour camps to work off their debts, all writing must pass a censorship board before being allowed on the shelves, there's a bright dawn ahead for Chris Hall, and one year's corporation tax from three international megacorporations has funded one dozen shiny black pencils for The Squish-lord's office. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Chris Hall's national animal is the free man, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Money Money Money.

Chris Hall is ranked 16th in the world and 1st in the Rejected Realms for Most Avoided, scoring 7,133.43 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.

Top
1%
Most Corrupt Governments: 6thLargest Insurance Industry: 10thMost Avoided: 16thHighest Disposable Incomes: 19thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 24thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 26thLargest Gambling Industry: 29thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 34thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 34thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 38thLargest Mining Sector: 38thHighest Average Incomes: 39thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 39thHighest Economic Output: 49thFattest Citizens: 58thMost Secular: 66thLargest Agricultural Sector: 81stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 91stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 108thLargest Retail Industry: 132ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 186thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 201stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 202ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 679thRudest Citizens: 696thMost Armed: 750thLargest Governments: 751stLowest Crime Rates: 796thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,261stLargest Black Market: 1,986thTop
5%
Largest Populations: 2,419thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 3,330thMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,801stLargest Publishing Industry: 3,823rdMost Efficient Economies: 4,280thLargest Information Technology Sector: 5,900thMost Conservative: 5,906thTop
10%
Smartest Citizens: 14,217thMost Stationary: 16,863rdMost Influential: 19,064th
Top
1%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionFattest Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 4th in the regionMost Secular: 5th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 14th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 17th in the regionRudest Citizens: 23rd in the regionMost Armed: 23rd in the regionLargest Governments: 24th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 29th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 33rd in the regionLargest Populations: 52nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 54th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 77th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 85th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 90th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 122nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 144th in the regionMost Stationary: 165th in the regionMost Conservative: 186th in the regionTop
10%
Most Influential: 318th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 325th in the regionMost Extreme: 559th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, one year's corporation tax from three international megacorporations has funded one dozen shiny black pencils for The Squish-lord's office.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, there's a bright dawn ahead for Chris Hall.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, all writing must pass a censorship board before being allowed on the shelves.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, university graduates and new home-owners toil in labour camps to work off their debts.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, babysitters are a thing of the past.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, billions are being spent on a new island airport.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, gun regulations are so strict even staple guns and hot glue guns are illegal.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, urban high-volume mailers now receive their mail via chauffeur-driven limousines.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, the word 'elite' appears as a synonym for various insults in the Chris Hallian Colonial Thesaurus.
  • : Following new legislation in Chris Hall, in court almost every witness is a hostile witness.

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