by Max Barry

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The Incorporated States of Cocktail Waitresses

“Straight up, right?”

Category: Civil Rights Lovefest
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Squire

Location: Balder


Cocktail Waitresses

Population18.487 billion

CapitalVending Machine
LeaderDoctor Benway

Animalalien life form

The Incorporated States of Cocktail Waitresses is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Doctor Benway with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 18.487 billion Cocktail Waitresses hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vending Machine. The average income tax rate is 98.9%.

The Cocktail Waitressing economy, worth a remarkable 1,825 trillion pogosticks a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 98,750 pogosticks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is funding experimental battery technology while the power grid continues to crumble, the phrase 'spreading like wildfire' is no longer in the public lexicon, judges who serve for life or good behavior can expect to stay for a week, and coffee cups have grown in size to accommodate the huge ingredients list. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cocktail Waitresses's national animal is the alien life form, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cocktail Waitresses is ranked 206,043rd in the world and 7,517th in Balder for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -29.63 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.

Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,247thMost Pacifist: 1,264thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1,306thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,397thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,465thLargest Welfare Programs: 1,513thSafest: 1,720thBest Weather: 1,731stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,784thTop
Largest Governments: 2,346thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,538thMost Advanced Public Education: 2,657thMost Advanced Public Transport: 2,680thMost Cheerful Citizens: 2,885thHealthiest Citizens: 3,155thMost Cultured: 3,300thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,346thSmartest Citizens: 3,465thLongest Average Lifespans: 3,489thNicest Citizens: 3,737thMost Compassionate Citizens: 4,233rdLeast Corrupt Governments: 4,246thLowest Crime Rates: 4,374thLargest Populations: 7,773rdMost Secular: 7,838thHighest Economic Output: 8,366thTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 10,658thMost Inclusive: 11,270thMost Influential: 11,499thMost Scientifically Advanced: 14,557thLargest Publishing Industry: 19,118thHighest Poor Incomes: 19,570th
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 12th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 39th in the regionMost Pacifist: 40th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 47th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 51st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 55th in the regionBest Weather: 55th in the regionSafest: 55th in the regionMost Influential: 55th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 59th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 66th in the regionTop
Largest Governments: 89th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 111th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 113th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 113th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 116th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 131st in the regionMost Cultured: 132nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 134th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 134th in the regionNicest Citizens: 153rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 160th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 172nd in the regionLargest Populations: 184th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 212th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 218th in the regionMost Secular: 306th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 345th in the regionTop
Most Stationary: 506th in the regionNudest: 561st in the regionMost Inclusive: 564th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 8 » Onder Kelkia, Fooooooooo, North East Somerset, Francovania, Phantom Nation, Noders, Kerethia, and Godly City.

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