by Max Barry

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The Communist Monarchy of Commonwealth Of Astoria

“Everyone Can Be Your Friend But only one can love you!” Rachel Dawn Amber

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Nipper

Location: The North Pacific


Commonwealth Of Astoria

Population9.976 billion

CapitalCommonwealth Of Astoria City
LeaderRachel Dawn Amber
FaithCult Of Amber

CurrencyAstorian Dollar
AnimalBlue Butterfly

The Communist Monarchy of Commonwealth Of Astoria is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Rachel Dawn Amber with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, state-planned economy, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 9.976 billion Commonwealth Of Astorians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Industry, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Commonwealth Of Astoria City. The average income tax rate is 97.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Commonwealth Of Astorian economy, worth a remarkable 3,705 trillion Astorian Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Retail, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 371,472 Astorian Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Serial killers are the country's biggest import, politicians have literally dirty hands from their extracurricular activities, the hills are alive with the smell of burning flesh, and produce labels read 'may contain traces of food'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Commonwealth Of Astoria's national animal is the Blue Butterfly, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Cult Of Amber.

Commonwealth Of Astoria is ranked 2,189th in the world and 105th in The North Pacific for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 9,007.69 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Most Subsidized Industry: 242ndLargest Black Market: 367thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 429thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 507thLargest Mining Sector: 668thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 692ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 747thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 908thHighest Average Incomes: 987thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,141stMost Influential: 1,379thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,559thMost Armed: 1,691stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,828thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,877thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,926thMost Efficient Economies: 1,991stTop
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 2,189thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 2,258thLargest Governments: 2,286thMost Avoided: 2,743rdLargest Retail Industry: 2,847thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,896thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,916thLowest Crime Rates: 2,922ndMost Advanced Public Education: 2,989thMost Cultured: 3,001stHighest Economic Output: 3,026thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,620thMost Devout: 3,659thLargest Publishing Industry: 5,342ndLargest Welfare Programs: 5,399thFattest Citizens: 5,628thLargest Insurance Industry: 6,031stMost Developed: 7,591stLongest Average Lifespans: 8,878thTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 11,215thSmartest Citizens: 14,168th
Largest Black Market: 12th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 14th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 15th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 24th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 26th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 28th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 33rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 38th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 39th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 52nd in the regionMost Armed: 64th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 74th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 83rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 83rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 88th in the regionMost Avoided: 88th in the regionTop
Highest Poor Incomes: 104th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 105th in the regionLargest Governments: 113th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 123rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 123rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 130th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 139th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 144th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 144th in the regionMost Devout: 146th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 150th in the regionMost Cultured: 153rd in the regionFattest Citizens: 202nd in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 241st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 265th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 275th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 453rd in the regionMost Developed: 457th in the regionTop
Largest Populations: 487th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 515th in the regionMost Influential: 569th in the regionRudest Citizens: 588th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 757th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 838th in the region

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