The Holy Traditionalist Empire of Creeperopolis is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Alexander II the Great with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, enslaved workforce, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.863 billion Creeperans are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alexandrov. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 72.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Creeperian economy, worth a remarkable 2,263 trillion New Creeperian Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 287,848 New Creeperian Dollars, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,641,229 per year while the poor average 24,504, a ratio of 67.0 to 1.

Economists confusingly list "fusarium rot and leaf blight" as major risk factors for monetary deflation, prisoners due for execution often use their final statement to complain about soggy bread rolls, the nation has recently been attributed to the funding of terrorist organisations, and sniffer dogs are trained to follow clouds of fruity-smelling vapor. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Creeperopolis's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Creeperopolis is ranked 41,027^th in the world and 56^th in Federation of Conservative Nations for Smartest Citizens, with 39.97 Quips Per Hour.