by Max Barry

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The Filipino Isolationist Union of CuzICan

“Ang lakas ay matatagpuan sa loob.”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Instigator

Location: New Rp

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

CuzICan

Population7.337 billion

CapitalManila
LeaderEduardo Osvaldo Hamid Santos
FaithTaoism

CurrencyPera
AnimalCarabao

The Filipino Isolationist Union of CuzICan is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Eduardo Osvaldo Hamid Santos with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, strictly enforced bedtime, and prohibition of alcohol. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.337 billion Filipinos are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Manila. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient CuzICanian economy, worth a remarkable 2,117 trillion Peras a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 288,629 Peras, with the richest citizens earning 7.7 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, cute fluffy little Eduardo Osvaldo Hamid Santos are increasingly popular exotic pets, the police crack down on tax evaders without mercy, and Animal Liberationists are regularly arrested. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. CuzICan's national animal is the Carabao, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Taoism.

CuzICan is ranked 98,750th in the world and 14th in New Rp for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 1,664.15 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 289thMost Valuable International Artwork: 818thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 839thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 853rdLowest Crime Rates: 921stMost Subsidized Industry: 1,201stMost Corrupt Governments: 1,251stLargest Governments: 1,341stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,343rdMost Devout: 1,395thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,561stMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,768thMost Efficient Economies: 1,994thTop
5%
Highest Average Incomes: 2,205thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,207thLargest Black Market: 2,230thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3,114thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,229thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,992ndMost Developed: 4,201stMost Advanced Public Education: 4,208thLargest Mining Sector: 4,419thSmartest Citizens: 6,756thHighest Economic Output: 6,922ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 7,634thLongest Average Lifespans: 8,948thTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 11,213thHighest Poor Incomes: 12,289thMost Conservative: 12,711thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 17,045thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 17,724thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 20,029th
Top
10%
Most Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : CuzICan's influence in New Rp rose from "Contender" to "Instigator".
  • : CuzICan's influence in New Rp rose from "Negotiator" to "Contender".
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, Animal Liberationists are regularly arrested.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, the police crack down on tax evaders without mercy.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, cute fluffy little Eduardo Osvaldo Hamid Santos are increasingly popular exotic pets.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public.
  • : CuzICan was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Conservative.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, adulthood begins with the creation of an email account.
  • : Following new legislation in CuzICan, conspiracy theorists allege that the government is spying on them through their carbon monoxide detectors.

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