The Principality of Czarskovia is a colossal, safe nation, notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, strictly enforced bedtime, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 6.707 billion Czarskovi are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vadanuz. The average income tax rate is 70.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Czarskovian economy, worth 624 trillion Delats a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Furniture Restoration, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 93,160 Delats, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

The only places to see Brown Bears now are at local zoos, Leader can cry on demand, the government has begun breaking all large businesses into thousands of mom-and-pop general stores, and the government is eagerly awaiting a multi-million Delat payment from a deposed Smalltopian monarch. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Czarskovia's national animal is the Brown Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

Czarskovia is ranked 283,730^th in the world and 192^nd in Christians for Most Pacifist, with 12.44 cheeks turned per day.