The Federated Union of Democratic Colonies is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Secretary General Thomas Mills with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, otherworldly petting zoo, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cheerful population of 37.883 billion Colonials have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The tiny government prioritizes Education, although Defense, Healthcare, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Viconia. The average income tax rate is 9.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Colonial economy, worth a remarkable 7,893 trillion DC Credits a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Automobile Manufacturing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 208,365 DC Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.9 times as much as the poorest.

Corporate lawyers are joyfully combing through the new tax code for any new loopholes for their clients, unemployed political consultants and advertisers spend every election night weeping for the good old days, citizens are encouraged to report friends, family members or co-workers who seem depressed to the government for "counselling", and mothers are routinely abandoning their children in the name of women's rights. Crime is totally unknown. Democratic Colonies's national animal is the Amber Hawk, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Democratic Colonies is ranked 25,488^th in the world and 7^th in Greater Prussia for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring 4,892.13 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.