by Max Barry

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The Reckless Foolies of Earth-Two

“Nyah na nyah, nyah na nyah, nyah na nyah, nyah na nyah.”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Average
Economy:
Good
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Apprentice

Location: United Earth Space Probe Agency

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Earth-Two

Population2.363 billion

CapitalThe Old Toy Shop
LeaderJahn

CurrencyFederation Credit
AnimalGrup

The Reckless Foolies of Earth-Two is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Jahn with a fair hand, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, aversion to nipples, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, democratic, devout population of 2.363 billion Onlies enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous government is primarily concerned with Administration, with Law & Order, Defense, and Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Old Toy Shop. The average income tax rate is 48.5%.

The Earth-Two economy, worth 83.4 trillion Federation Credits a year, is quite specialized and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 35,274 Federation Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Supermodels maintain their skinny form by running away from government officials, the government is known to care more about its buildings than its people, the nation is so apathetic that Onlies can barely find the energy to bring new issues to the government, and veterans' meet-ups involve a lot of tail sniffing. Crime, especially youth-related, is a serious problem. Earth-Two's national animal is the Grup, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Earth-Two is ranked 38,152nd in the world and 13th in United Earth Space Probe Agency for Rudest Citizens, with 77.77 Insults Per Minute.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 1,232ndTop
5%
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 5,536thMost Ignorant Citizens: 9,583rdTop
10%
Most Devout: 11,271stMost Rebellious Youth: 11,434thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 12,217thMost Valuable International Artwork: 13,579thMost Avoided: 14,049thHighest Crime Rates: 18,660thLargest Black Market: 18,741stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 20,816th
Top
5%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Primitive: 3rd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 8th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Black Market: 10th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 12th in the regionRudest Citizens: 13th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 14th in the regionMost Devout: 14th in the regionMost Stationary: 14th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 16th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 16th in the regionLargest Populations: 16th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 19th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Earth-Two was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Cheese Export Sector and Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, veterans' meet-ups involve a lot of tail sniffing.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, the nation is so apathetic that Onlies can barely find the energy to bring new issues to the government.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, the government is known to care more about its buildings than its people.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, supermodels maintain their skinny form by running away from government officials.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, The Old Toy Shop's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight.
  • : Earth-Two's influence in United Earth Space Probe Agency fell from "Vassal" to "Apprentice".
  • : Earth-Two's influence in United Earth Space Probe Agency rose from "Apprentice" to "Vassal".
  • : Earth-Two was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Valuable International Artwork and the Top 10% for Highest Crime Rates.
  • : Following new legislation in Earth-Two, Jahn is rumored to have teleportation powers.

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