The Republic of Fantalandia is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Coca-Cola CEO Muhtar Kent with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, state-planned economy, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 9.268 billion Fantalandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fanta Fountain. The average income tax rate is 47.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Fantalandian economy, worth a remarkable 1,536 trillion Fantas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Retail, Woodchip Exports, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 165,769 Fantas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

Cub scouts are being asked to hand in their woggles as the state withdraws funding for scouting, fathers are free to sell their daughters to whomever they choose, foreign nationals are widely distrusted, and X-Files ratings have hit an all-time low. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Fantalandia's national animal is the Fanta Fish, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Fantalandia is ranked 4,745^th in the world and 4^th in Glass Gallows for Rudest Citizens, with 146.19 Insults Per Minute.