The Democratic Republic of Farmina is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by President Malcolm Prince with an even hand, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, ubiquitous missile silos, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 32.742 billion Farminans are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The tiny, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Law & Order, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Verica. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Farminan economy, worth an astonishing 10,939 trillion Harens a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Gambling. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 334,125 Harens, with the richest citizens earning 5.0 times as much as the poorest.

The Department of Reduction of Bureaucratic Red Tape has set up a working committee to investigate its own excessive paperwork, the government recently donated a surfboard to an impoverished family in a landlocked region, sniffer dogs are trained to follow clouds of fruity-smelling vapor, and businessmen walk out of meetings halfway because their shift is over. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Farmina's national animal is the Hawk, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Farmina is ranked 47,733^rd in the world and 2,616^th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 68 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.