by Max Barry

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The Holy Empire of FiHami

“If ya can't beat 'em... BURN 'EM!!!”

Category: Democratic Socialists
Civil Rights:
Average
Economy:
Reasonable
Political Freedoms:
Excellent

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: the South Pacific

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

FiHami

Population587 million

CapitalHa'Hani

CurrencyFlamethrowers
AnimalPhoenix

The Holy Empire of FiHami is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its digital currency, avowedly heterosexual populace, and lack of airports. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 587 million FiHamians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ha'Hani. The average income tax rate is 69.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient FiHamian economy, worth 17.5 trillion Flamethrowers a year, is quite specialized and led by the Basket Weaving industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 29,819 Flamethrowers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

FiHamian companies generally just fire employees in lieu of giving them vacation, relationship guidance consists of "lie back and think of FiHami", the nation's diplomats shake hands with those whose hands are drenched in the blood of innocents, and five-year-olds chanting "Little Miss Muffet" are accused of bullying arachnophobes. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. FiHami's national animal is the Phoenix, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

FiHami is ranked 23,707th in the world and 821st in the South Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 7.73 Bananas Ingested Per Day.

Top
5%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 2,213thMost Influential: 4,405thMost Devout: 5,345thTop
10%
Most Rebellious Youth: 9,399thLeast Corrupt Governments: 10,312th
Top
5%
Most Devout: 132nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 229th in the regionTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 364th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 410th in the regionMost Influential: 442nd in the regionMost Cultured: 537th in the regionBest Weather: 568th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 584th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : FiHami endorsed The End of Grimsby town.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, five-year-olds chanting "Little Miss Muffet" are accused of bullying arachnophobes.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, the nation's diplomats shake hands with those whose hands are drenched in the blood of innocents.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, relationship guidance consists of "lie back and think of FiHami".
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, FiHamian companies generally just fire employees in lieu of giving them vacation.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, military equipment stores have a tendency to go up in flames.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, government-sanctioned factory-smashing has the Luddites of FiHami rejoicing.
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, GP clinics are inundated by patients requesting prescriptions for alcohol.
  • : FiHami voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Reducing Food Waste".
  • : Following new legislation in FiHami, teenage TV characters are played by thirty-year-olds by the end of the second season.

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