The Western Card Czar of Giovanniland is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by King Giovanni I with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, ubiquitous missile silos, and smutty television. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 2.162 billion Giovannilandians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Giovannistadt. The average income tax rate is 83.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Giovannilandian economy, worth 524 trillion Blue Orbs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Gambling, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 242,563 Blue Orbs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Teenagers across the country are celebrating the defeat of a national curfew bill, groups of government workers are declared protected tribes if they venture too deep into the Capitol, the nation's universities are often mistaken for foreign embassies, and people often get liposuction to reduce their air fares. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Giovanniland's national animal is the Elephant, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Violetism.

Giovanniland is ranked 101,027^th in the world and 2,616^th in the West Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 9.93 Obesity Rate.