by Max Barry

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The Hidden Undergound Lair of Gnomewatchers

“Mood: Purple funk, brains whirling, ready for anything”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Superpower

Location: Shiloh

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Gnomewatchers

Population31.718 billion

CapitalGnomeria
LeaderGnomad

Currencycrown
Animalgarden gnome

The Hidden Undergound Lair of Gnomewatchers is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Gnomad with an iron fist, and remarkable for its complete lack of prisons, smutty television, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 31.718 billion Gnomes are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gnomeria. The average income tax rate is 88.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Gnomeian economy, worth a remarkable 3,370 trillion crowns a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 106,259 crowns, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Kids looking for shark teeth have become ancient history, every politician claims to be at least 1% Native Gnomeian, election ballot papers are so long that unused ones are recycled as toilet roll, and brave curators do battle with disorganised government libraries. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gnomewatchers's national animal is the garden gnome, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Gnomewatchers is ranked 20,639th in the world and 1st in Shiloh for Most Cultured, scoring 90 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

Top
5%
Largest Populations: 3,624thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,868thLargest Black Market: 4,982ndHighest Economic Output: 6,108thMost Advanced Public Education: 6,246thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6,726thMost Secular: 7,504thMost Beautiful Environments: 9,235thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 9,365thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 9,644thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 11,110thHighest Average Tax Rates: 11,961stMost Armed: 11,981stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 12,696thTop
10%
Most Subsidized Industry: 16,038thMost Developed: 17,248thLargest Publishing Industry: 18,940thMost Cultured: 20,639thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 20,980thSmartest Citizens: 22,363rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 22,959thLargest Governments: 25,327th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh fell from "Dominator" to "Superpower".
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh rose from "Powerbroker" to "Dominator".
  • : Gnomewatchers was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Zombies.
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh fell from "Power" to "Powerbroker".
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh rose from "Powerbroker" to "Power".
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh fell from "Power" to "Powerbroker".
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh rose from "Powerbroker" to "Power".
  • : Gnomewatchers was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Patriotic.
  • : Gnomewatchers's influence in Shiloh rose from "Eminence Grise" to "Powerbroker".
  • : Gnomewatchers was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Patriotic.

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