The Holy Empire of Great Hozendoff is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Grand Hozz with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, infamous sell-swords, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 18.146 billion Great Hozendoffians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Social Policy and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hozengrad. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Great Hozendoffian economy, worth a remarkable 5,336 trillion Hozzes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 294,091 Hozzes, with the richest citizens earning 6.0 times as much as the poorest.

One complaint of Great Hozendoff's new periodic table is it's easy to confuse fearlessleaderium with gloriousleaderium, the government is buying children's books by the thousands, the navy is chrome-plating its battleships to prevent rust, and doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Great Hozendoff's national animal is the Meerkat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is The Hozzian Truth.

Great Hozendoff is ranked 3,082^nd in the world and 76^th in the South Pacific for Most Patriotic, with 95.49 flags saluted per person per day.