by Max Barry

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The Loli Union Federal Republic of Ham Federation

“B-Baka!!” Loli Supreme Leader Princess Adeline

Category: Mother Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The North Pacific

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Ham Federation

Population3.383 billion

CapitalMetrololi
LeaderLoli Supreme Leader Princess Adeline
FaithLolism

CurrencyDoll Hair
AnimalHindslavic Pig

The Loli Union Federal Republic of Ham Federation is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Loli Supreme Leader Princess Adeline with an iron fist, and renowned for its free-roaming dinosaurs, infamous sell-swords, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical population of 3.383 billion Lolis are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Metrololi. The average income tax rate is 62.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Loli economy, worth 409 trillion Doll Hairs a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 120,923 Doll Hairs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

On-duty Air Ham Federation flight attendants are usually seen napping in first class, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists, warfare increasingly resembles a video game, and right-wingers complain that too many people are suckling at the welfare teat. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ham Federation's national animal is the Hindslavic Pig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Lolism.

Ham Federation is ranked 196,582nd in the world and 9,463rd in The North Pacific for Largest Mining Sector, scoring -11.4 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.

Top
1%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 820thMost Influential: 1,126thTop
5%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 2,935thMost Cheerful Citizens: 9,972ndTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 10,659thMost Developed: 14,279thLargest Agricultural Sector: 14,412thHighest Poor Incomes: 14,603rdLowest Crime Rates: 17,030thMost Efficient Economies: 18,436thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 18,996thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 20,168thMost Subsidized Industry: 20,688th
Top
5%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 121st in the regionMost Influential: 445th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 478th in the regionTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 536th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 657th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 750th in the regionMost Developed: 751st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 763rd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 806th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 828th in the regionMost Stationary: 840th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 876th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 893rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 911th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 931st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 942nd in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 210 » Ethnon, Empy, Territorio di Nessuno, Shibutani, Frances Francis the First of France, Cloydicia, Yaorozu, Govornia, Omnistria, Minuda, Kwaj, Notyoutopia, Waupun Island, The Austro Germanic Union, Corfad, The Rhein States, Siwale, El Fiji Grande, Diodone, Pallaith, Great Bights Mum, Malta Comino Gozo, Joodey, Ninjak30, Napnomadia, Kasazzastan, Bearical, East Supple Lund, Koda-Land, Unsophisticate, United States of Americanas, Sundred, United Draconia, Dreadton, Shadowrik, Eri-Maqa-Ena, Vincone Cae, Holy Oranz, The Windmilluminati, New Pruessen, Wineclaw, PlanetPunk, Pasargad, Selfgradatude, Antiyard, Buckerino, Wilkshire, Guer Aike, North Bratislava, Dar es Saalam, and 160 others.Kobagia, Potatolandium, Universal State Formula, Moubarakistan, Panama Coalition, New Trisone, Sunto, The Sinclarian Provinces, Atain, Sil Dorsett, Partax, Cinnibar, Asgardira, Niradans, The Iron Lions, Votak Matim, Egalico, Solmetria, Warsaw-Halicz, Maott, Acrabinnia, Steampunk Ariel, Plangainer, Sea Ghost, Trillius, Haor Chall, Unimaginable Doom, Astronomical, Valhalla123, Nakayo, 1 very fast endotarter, British Pacific Islands, Loutsland, Destructive Government Endorsing System, Republic of New Atlantis, Noahs Second Country, Former English Colony, Xentherida, Glurponia, Abject Ludicrosity, Zumlandia, Runeda, Daiz, Seenvorland, The Tampa Bay Rays, Zeternia, New Octicarg, Wisconsota, Dicko, Orado, McMasterdonia, The Stratosphere Islands, Tellavinna, Gnomewatchers, Eteles, Serendipita Martia, PotatoFarmers, Clan Spaniel, United Kahndaq, Kranostav, Yukti, Pazair, Viridiann, Dabarastan, Zyvetskistaahn, Fizban, Ravendi, Interdimensional Zone, Sile Maungistan, Castle Federation, Palgo, Valentine Z, Terban Kedah, Praeceps, Fendlium, Volstokn, Cobleck Weleis, Tachycardia, Lungha, Hamerica, Loli County, Merconitonitopia, Valatic Ash, Xagill, The New Communist Republic Of States, MiaryBhalzhack, The Endless Eventide, Newpromisedland, SherpDaWerp in TNP, Ihese, Crader, Yokciq Empire, SORT, Varola, Avastate, New Lakemba, Supreme Leader Hadrian, Nistriabar, Unshleepd, Woodsend, Schnuftelland, The Pantheons, Korovan Isles, The Most Freedom Ever, The Serdey Islands, Fauzjhia, Mesopotama, Greater Pittsburgh, FROST33, PortvgaI, Frostcell, Sikol, Saperisole, Aoncarpa, Westinor, Iztocna Slavija, Zzozona, Hoglands, Plutayah, Veast, Termathe, Libertania Democratica, I Like Killing people, Prydania, The Calabash Protectorate, Shinjuku tokyo 0, Asoc lon, Yalgora, Seanat, Brucklania, Arichia, Maclare, Arbor Marshes, Highton Islands, Damsmel, Borsukia, Kocherian, New Jamgra, Xyrron, The New Cordian Empire, Smesh, Madjack, Eschatosia, Ihsan, Kragsgale, Xipher, Simone Republic, Astal Aavors, Amerian States, Illusia and Neverendia, Buckhem, Ultra777, Eastern Cous Empria, Andexia, Principia Mathematica, U S Eh, Dechire par la Guerre, Free Nation of Hong Kong, Great Robertia, and Heilhum Imperius.

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