by Max Barry

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The Thirteen Zombie Hells of HC Eredivisie

“Worldrankings: First and last.”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Regional Influence: Truckler

Location: belgium

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

HC Eredivisie

Population35.007 billion

CapitalA little village up the coast
LeaderRichard
FaithMax Barryism

CurrencyFwoosh
AnimalHctib Elttil

The Thirteen Zombie Hells of HC Eredivisie is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Richard with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, enslaved workforce, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 35.007 billion HC Eredivisieans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of A little village up the coast. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient HC Eredivisiean economy, worth an astonishing 38,296 trillion Fwooshes a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,093,968 Fwooshes, with the richest citizens earning 5.5 times as much as the poorest.

Terrorist videos start by thanking their sponsors, if foreigners can hit a spittoon from five paces they get a free holiday to HC Eredivisie, the military is researching proton packs and PK-meters to combat "unseen enemy forces", and it's not just poseurs who wear oversized sound-cancelling headphones as they walk the city streets. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. HC Eredivisie's national animal is the Hctib Elttil, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Max Barryism.

HC Eredivisie is ranked 3rd in the world and 1st in belgium for Highest Economic Output, with 38,296 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Largest Mining Sector: 2ndHighest Average Incomes: 3rdHighest Economic Output: 3rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 6thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 7thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 7thLargest Insurance Industry: 9thLargest Black Market: 13thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 14thLargest Agricultural Sector: 15thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 15thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 23rdLargest Cheese Export Sector: 23rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 27thMost Corrupt Governments: 38thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 39thMost Avoided: 40thHighest Poor Incomes: 51stLargest Governments: 82ndMost Subsidized Industry: 97thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 113thFattest Citizens: 132ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 133rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 141stMost Secular: 166thLowest Crime Rates: 267thMost Advanced Public Transport: 308thMost Efficient Economies: 390thLargest Populations: 406thLargest Retail Industry: 513thLargest Gambling Industry: 699thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,122ndTop
5%
Rudest Citizens: 1,688thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,941stLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,655thMost Scientifically Advanced: 5,852ndMost Influential: 6,015thTop
10%
Most Conservative: 7,571stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 10,346thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 10,350thMost Advanced Public Education: 14,175th
Top
1%
Largest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionMost Secular: 2nd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3rd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 4th in the regionLargest Populations: 4th in the regionMost Conservative: 4th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 5th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 5th in the regionTop
10%
Most Advanced Public Education: 6th in the regionMost Influential: 7th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 9th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 9th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : HC Eredivisie was endorsed by The Kingdom of Drink a Stella.
  • : HC Eredivisie was endorsed by The Belgian Detective of Hercule Poirot.
  • : HC Eredivisie's influence in Belgium fell from "Handshaker" to "Truckler".
  • : HC Eredivisie's influence in Belgium rose from "Truckler" to "Handshaker".
  • : Following new legislation in HC Eredivisie, it's not just poseurs who wear oversized sound-cancelling headphones as they walk the city streets.
  • : Following new legislation in HC Eredivisie, the military is researching proton packs and PK-meters to combat "unseen enemy forces".
  • : Following new legislation in HC Eredivisie, if foreigners can hit a spittoon from five paces they get a free holiday to HC Eredivisie.
  • : Following new legislation in HC Eredivisie, terrorist videos start by thanking their sponsors.
  • : Following new legislation in HC Eredivisie, glancing at the car radio display while driving is treated as attempted homicide.
  • : HC Eredivisie was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Conservative.

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 2 » Rain and Shadow and Drink a Stella.

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