The Private Estate of Jeffery Epstein Island Sovereignty is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Jeffrey Epstein with an even hand, and renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, ubiquitous missile silos, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 1.24 billion Epsteinians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mount Tempis. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.2%.

The very strong Epsteinian economy, worth 70.0 trillion Epstein Dollars a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Furniture Restoration, Uranium Mining, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 56,471 Epstein Dollars, with the richest citizens earning 9.3 times as much as the poorest.

Pet rocks are sold by the pound, the immigration office has an express line for people bringing cash in briefcases, not showing enough enthusiasm for mutual assured destruction is a court-martial offence, and dog breeding has been banned in accordance with recent animal experimentation laws. Crime, especially youth-related, is a major problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Jeffery Epstein Island Sovereignty's national animal is the Tiger, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Jeffery Epstein Island Sovereignty is ranked 216,356^th in the world and 129^th in Barbaria for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring 68.04 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.