by Max Barry

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The Abstract Influencer of Jehovahs Witness

“Modernizing supernatural and multidimensional concepts.”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Few
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Diplomat

Location: The Bar on the corner of every region

OverviewDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Jehovahs Witness

Population8.091 billion

CapitalRandom Bunker In A Hotel
LeaderThe Witness
FaithJehovah's Witnesses

Currencyvague monetary concept
Animalinsert animal here

The Abstract Influencer of Jehovahs Witness is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Witness with an iron fist, and notable for its ritual sacrifices, lack of airports, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.091 billion drones are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Spirituality and Environment are also considered important, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Random Bunker In A Hotel. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 91.1%.

The frighteningly efficient sacrificed economy, worth a remarkable 1,694 trillion vague monetary concepts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing and Gambling. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 209,439 vague monetary concepts, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 599,636 per year while the poor average 58,235, a ratio of 10.3 to 1.

School lockers are filled with fancy underwear, war vets look after war animals, rumor has it that The Witness has won three lotteries in a row, and a division of tanks navigating "as the crow flies" has driven into a ravine. Crime is all-pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Jehovahs Witness's national animal is the insert animal here, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Jehovah's Witnesses.

Jehovahs Witness is ranked 165,198th in the world and 58th in The Bar on the corner of every region for Most Pro-Market, scoring -54.89 on the Rand Index.

Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 78thMost Primitive: 93rdMost Devout: 94thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 137thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 484thMost Corrupt Governments: 593rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 632ndLargest Gambling Industry: 846thMost Armed: 859thLargest Black Market: 964thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 974thFattest Citizens: 1,204thBest Weather: 1,332ndHighest Crime Rates: 1,435thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,540thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,675thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,739thTop
5%
Rudest Citizens: 2,560thNudest: 2,776thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,151stHighest Average Incomes: 5,573rdLargest Governments: 7,241stHighest Average Tax Rates: 7,385thMost Subsidized Industry: 8,148thHighest Economic Output: 9,052ndMost Efficient Economies: 9,984thTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 11,258thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 11,766thMost Influential: 12,321stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 13,360thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 14,993rd
Top
5%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionBest Weather: 2nd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 2nd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 3rd in the regionNudest: 3rd in the regionTop
10%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 4th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 5th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 5th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 5th in the regionMost Armed: 6th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 6th in the region

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 5 » Woods Is Back, Brocklandia, Kitty Hitler, Anacin, and Untermensch.

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