by Max Barry

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The United Socialist States of Joseph Gorbachev

“Sometimes - history needs a push.- V.I. Lenin”

Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Good
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Sprat

Location: the South Pacific

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Joseph Gorbachev

Population395 million

CurrencyRuble
AnimalRussian Bear

The United Socialist States of Joseph Gorbachev is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its frequent executions, free-roaming dinosaurs, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 395 million Joseph Gorbachevians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Welfare. The average income tax rate is 69.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Joseph Gorbachevian economy, worth 22.1 trillion Rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Cheese Exports, and Retail. Average income is 55,903 Rubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Concussed Russian Bearball players cannot remember their lineup position, hiding wrinkles with make-up is illegal, extraordinary rendition is nothing out of the ordinary, and businesses are abandoning the city centre because of the lack of transport connections. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Joseph Gorbachev's national animal is the Russian Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Joseph Gorbachev is ranked 107,208th in the world and 2,031st in the South Pacific for Highest Economic Output, with 22.1 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Top
5%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 3,233rdTop
10%
Most Influential: 7,586thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7,987thMost Authoritarian: 11,139thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 11,772ndHighest Drug Use: 12,316thMost Income Equality: 12,817thLargest Agricultural Sector: 13,115thLargest Welfare Programs: 14,679th
Top
5%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 209th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 306th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 373rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 406th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 423rd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 547th in the regionMost Income Equality: 568th in the regionMost Influential: 571st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Joseph Gorbachev was endorsed by The Kingdom of Sedunn.
  • : Joseph Gorbachev was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Welfare Programs.
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, businesses are abandoning the city centre because of the lack of transport connections.
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, extraordinary rendition is nothing out of the ordinary.
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, hiding wrinkles with make-up is illegal.
  • : Joseph Gorbachev was endorsed by The Divine Abode of Churumduul.
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, concussed Russian Bearball players cannot remember their lineup position.
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, the standard government reply to any query is "there is no spoon".
  • : Joseph Gorbachev was reclassified from "Psychotic Dictatorship" to "Corrupt Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Joseph Gorbachev, torture is commonly used to extract information from suspected criminals.

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