The Matriarchy of Kalimport is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Grand Precept with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, keen interest in outer space, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate population of 7.507 billion Kalimportians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kalimport City. The average income tax rate is 95.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Kalimportian economy, worth a remarkable 1,429 trillion Dewgongs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 190,400 Dewgongs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Whipping posts and lashes have been transferred to the Historical Museum of Kalimportian Embarrassments, the Kalimport Automotive Racing Series draws millions of spectators annually while those near the tracks complain about the noise, it's said that Grand Precept can turn every pleasure into a chore, and building a phallus out of Minecraft blocks counts as indecent exposure. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kalimport's national animal is the Golden Opera, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Logic and Reason.

Kalimport is ranked 304,611^th in the world and 603^rd in 10000 Islands for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -11.4 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.