The Federation of Kalvitica is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Kell Listner with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, museums and concert halls, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, devout population of 17.851 billion Kalviticans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kalvitifun Castle. The average income tax rate is 62.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Kalvitican economy, worth a remarkable 1,417 trillion chestnuts a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 79,416 chestnuts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

There's nothing special about Kell Listner, extraordinary tribunals try accused financial criminals, noises louder than a whisper have been prohibited by law, and the Smalltopian embassy doubles as an electoral campaign headquarters. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Kalvitica's national animal is the platypus, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Kalvitica is ranked 269,785^th in the world and 3^rd in Kaentaria for Most Secular, with 11.76 Atheism Rate.