The Prime Hegemony of Kelvaros Prime is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Hegemon Arcilius Merello with an iron fist, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, keen interest in outer space, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 30.266 billion Primes are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jenera. The average income tax rate is 96.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Prime economy, worth an astonishing 12,914 trillion Credits a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 426,700 Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Twice-daily toilet inspection rotas for government buildings are archived for public appraisal, modern warfare's call of duty isn't popular with gamers these days, the nation won three wars against Brancaland this weekend, and the armed forces are locked in an expensive and bloody war abroad to stamp out possible terrorists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kelvaros Prime's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Humanism.

Kelvaros Prime is ranked 315,482^nd in the world and 5,985^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -1063.14 on the Scary Big Number Scale.