by Max Barry

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The Armed Republic of Knowwear in Youtopia

“Give pea... ummm... war a chance.”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: the Rejected Realms

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendNuke ControlCards

Knowwear in Youtopia

Population28.803 billion

CapitalDuck City
LeaderDarkwing Duck
FaithDuckism

Currencydeutsche mark
Animalduck

The Armed Republic of Knowwear in Youtopia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Darkwing Duck with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, parental licensing program, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 28.803 billion Knowwear in Youtopians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order and Spirituality are also considered important, while Welfare and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Duck City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 5.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Knowwear in Youtopian economy, worth an astonishing 12,690 trillion deutsche marks a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 440,581 deutsche marks, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,435,941 per year while the poor average 40,185, a ratio of 60.6 to 1.

The government terminates employment with extreme prejudice, safe drinking water is considered a luxury, veterans' meet-ups involve a lot of tail sniffing, and food imports have skyrocketed after the recent 'Forage for Food' program severely backfired. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Knowwear in Youtopia's national animal is the duck, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Duckism.

Knowwear in Youtopia is ranked 233,775th in the world and 5,717th in the Rejected Realms for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -4.02 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Devout: 6thMost Ignorant Citizens: 8thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 9thMost Primitive: 10thLargest Mining Sector: 13thMost Avoided: 23rdMost Corrupt Governments: 27thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 27thFattest Citizens: 31stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 44thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 106thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 108thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 123rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 236thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 421stHighest Economic Output: 462ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 639thMost Patriotic: 650thHighest Average Incomes: 747thRudest Citizens: 767thMost Efficient Economies: 958thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,669thLargest Governments: 1,788thLowest Crime Rates: 1,968thLargest Black Market: 2,296thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,669thTop
5%
Largest Populations: 4,967thNudest: 12,742ndMost Stationary: 14,452ndMost Influential: 14,864thMost Valuable International Artwork: 14,908thTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 16,891stMost Conservative: 21,842ndGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 29,071st
Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 4th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 10th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 12th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 14th in the regionMost Patriotic: 20th in the regionRudest Citizens: 22nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 26th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 31st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 38th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 39th in the regionLargest Governments: 61st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 63rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 63rd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 67th in the regionLargest Populations: 75th in the regionTop
5%
Most Stationary: 219th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 339th in the regionNudest: 351st in the regionTop
10%
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 384th in the regionMost Influential: 387th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 625th in the regionMost Conservative: 663rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Knowwear in Youtopia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Valuable International Artwork.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, food imports have skyrocketed after the recent 'Forage for Food' program severely backfired.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, veterans' meet-ups involve a lot of tail sniffing.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, safe drinking water is considered a luxury.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, the government terminates employment with extreme prejudice.
  • : Knowwear in Youtopia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Influential.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, voodoo economists believe that feeding criminals to volcanoes will bring untold riches to Knowwear in Youtopia.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, landless farmers wander forlornly in the government's many national parks.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, an enormous health awareness programme is underway.
  • : Following new legislation in Knowwear in Youtopia, a paperwork error has naval privateers being directed to attack land-locked nations.

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