The Federation of Krimera is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Supreme Leader Viktor Kruschev with an iron fist, and notable for its prohibition of alcohol, aversion to nipples, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 9.475 billion Krimerans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Industry, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kremaras. The average income tax rate is 99.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Krimeran economy, worth a remarkable 4,860 trillion Marxes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 512,946 Marxes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Professionals are ready to retire by the time they receive permission to use their credentials, hospitals fear government fines more than terrorist ransoms, metal detectors at school gates make sure that teenagers are carrying at least one sidearm, and blue sky thinkers are reminded that the firmament is actually more of a grey-ish colour. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Krimera's national animal is the Black Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Krimera is ranked 192,136^th in the world and 121^st in The Wolf Clan for Fattest Citizens, with 8.49 Obesity Rate.