by Max Barry

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The Equal Tribal Confederacy of Middle Ketalia

“A people, yet unlanded.”

Category: Democratic Socialists
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Very Strong
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Squire

Location: Lazarus

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Middle Ketalia

Population4.073 billion

CapitalThe Court-City of the Peacemaker-Spirit
LeaderPeacemaker Salmonette Raindrop
FaithThe Mystery Cult of Ketal

CurrencyKet
AnimalStarling

The Equal Tribal Confederacy of Middle Ketalia is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Peacemaker Salmonette Raindrop with an even hand, and remarkable for its frequent executions, prohibition of alcohol, and state-planned economy. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 4.073 billion Middle Ketalians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Environment, Education, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Court-City of the Peacemaker-Spirit. The average income tax rate is 92.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Middle Ketalic economy, worth 385 trillion Kets a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 94,643 Kets, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign nations kill migratory animals at random in the hope that Middle Ketalia will pay them to stop, there are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees his shadow, politicians have literally dirty hands from their extracurricular activities, and the nation's diplomats shake hands with those whose hands are drenched in the blood of innocents. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Middle Ketalia's national animal is the Starling, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Mystery Cult of Ketal.

Middle Ketalia is ranked 155,541st in the world and 5,739th in Lazarus for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring -19.39 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 54thMost Devout: 149thBest Weather: 538thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 718thMost Beautiful Environments: 795thLargest Welfare Programs: 1,159thMost Ignorant Citizens: 1,194thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,239thMost Pacifist: 1,502ndTop
5%
Longest Average Lifespans: 1,852ndLeast Corrupt Governments: 2,169thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 2,512thMost Inclusive: 2,519thMost Compassionate Citizens: 2,632ndMost Income Equality: 2,703rdMost Cultured: 2,773rdNicest Citizens: 2,887thMost Influential: 2,955thMost Advanced Public Education: 3,634thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3,779thMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,198thLargest Governments: 5,435thHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,288thLowest Crime Rates: 7,083rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 7,292ndTop
10%
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 9,344thHighest Poor Incomes: 11,145th
Top
1%
Most Primitive: 2nd in the regionMost Devout: 10th in the regionBest Weather: 21st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 30th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 38th in the regionMost Income Equality: 46th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 49th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 56th in the regionTop
5%
Most Pacifist: 66th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 73rd in the regionMost Influential: 73rd in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 74th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 75th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 102nd in the regionMost Inclusive: 102nd in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 117th in the regionMost Cultured: 118th in the regionNicest Citizens: 122nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 184th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 274th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Governments: 300th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 380th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 392nd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 437th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 440th in the regionMost Stationary: 504th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, the nation's diplomats shake hands with those whose hands are drenched in the blood of innocents.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, politicians have literally dirty hands from their extracurricular activities.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, there are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees his shadow.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, foreign nations kill migratory animals at random in the hope that Middle Ketalia will pay them to stop.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, murderers and thieves claim divine inspiration to avoid prosecution.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, Middle Ketalians have replaced bears in a popular idiom.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, children as young as eight can present logical proofs for the existence of the afterlife.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, ship captains always order a return to port at the slightest sign of rain.
  • : Following new legislation in Middle Ketalia, young girls often attend the same schools as their children.

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