by Max Barry

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The United Socialist States of Mizanzukistao

“Dedo no c*, ousadia e gritaria” Mizanzuk

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Below Average
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The East Pacific



Population2.974 billion

CapitalRepública de Curitiba


The United Socialist States of Mizanzukistao is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Mizanzuk with an iron fist, and remarkable for its public floggings, infamous sell-swords, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 2.974 billion Mizanzukis are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of República de Curitiba. The average income tax rate is 66.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Mizanzukistaoan economy, worth 260 trillion dogecoins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 87,445 dogecoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Old dogs don't have to learn new tricks but they have to prove they haven't forgotten old ones, the "boy who cried wolf" policy makes sick people reluctant to call an ambulance, dubiously qualified Skandilundian barristers keep referring to laws as 'government guidelines', and the government has solemnly sworn not to look up other nations' internet browsing history if the favor is returned. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mizanzukistao's national animal is the dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Gilmarism.

Mizanzukistao is ranked 109,465th in the world and 4,746th in The East Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 21.78 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 3,231stMost Influential: 4,930thTop
Largest Agricultural Sector: 8,830thMost Secular: 10,110thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 12,891stMost Subsidized Industry: 15,515thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 15,800thMost Developed: 16,107th
Largest Agricultural Sector: 252nd in the regionMost Secular: 319th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 333rd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 362nd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 364th in the regionTop
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 375th in the regionMost Influential: 400th in the regionMost Stationary: 450th in the regionMost Developed: 469th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 481st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 488th in the regionBest Weather: 532nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 560th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 566th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 570th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 617th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 651st in the regionLargest Populations: 666th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 685th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 691st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 705th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 708th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 724th in the region

National Happenings

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