by Max Barry

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The Second Best of Noahs Second Country

Noahs Second Country was Condemned by Security Council Resolution # 320

“₂”

Category: Anarchy
Civil Rights:
Frightening
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Corrupted

Regional Influence: Minnow

Location: The North Pacific

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Issues Editor

Noahs Second Country

Population16.563 billion

Capitalsecond best capital city
LeaderNoah
Faithabusing the anti-abuse system

Currencysecond best currency
Animalsecond best animal

The Second Best of Noahs Second Country is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Noah with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 16.563 billion second best citizens live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of second best capital city. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient second best economy, worth a remarkable 7,153 trillion second best currencies a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Soda Sales, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 431,879 second best currencies, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,013,583 per year while the poor average 4,288, a ratio of 935 to 1.

The nation's "surprisingly chill" military is renowned for its horrendous war crimes, an online tea-bagging epidemic is getting worse and (meta)worse, leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks, and it's a common sight to see angry commuters with grenade launchers mounted on their vehicles. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Noahs Second Country's national animal is the second best animal, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is abusing the anti-abuse system.

Noahs Second Country is ranked 303,381st in the world and 6,037th in The North Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring -47.33 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Top
1%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 5thMost Extreme: 6thRudest Citizens: 31stHighest Crime Rates: 81stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 93rdHighest Drug Use: 96thMost Armed: 100thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 102ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 103rdGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 116thFattest Citizens: 131stMost Avoided: 134thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 138thHighest Disposable Incomes: 209thMost Rebellious Youth: 262ndLargest Gambling Industry: 270thLargest Retail Industry: 334thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 456thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 459thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 481stHighest Average Incomes: 885thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1,050thLargest Insurance Industry: 1,149thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,157thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 1,215thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,259thMost Efficient Economies: 1,394thMost Politically Free: 1,488thMost Pro-Market: 1,514thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,619thLargest Mining Sector: 1,700thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,736thHighest Economic Output: 1,821stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1,933rdMost Secular: 2,029thMost Cultured: 2,541stMost Cheerful Citizens: 2,640thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2,747thLargest Publishing Industry: 2,757thSmartest Citizens: 2,775thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,921stLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,036thTop
5%
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 4,550thMost Inclusive: 6,661stMost Influential: 13,259thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 13,371stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 13,432ndMost Stationary: 13,654thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 14,658thTop
10%
Nudest: 17,573rdLargest Governments: 21,241stMost Subsidized Industry: 22,301stLargest Populations: 24,590thLargest Black Market: 28,919th
Top
1%
Most Extreme: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 2nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Politically Free: 2nd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3rd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 3rd in the regionHighest Drug Use: 3rd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 5th in the regionMost Armed: 5th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 5th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 5th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 5th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6th in the regionMost Avoided: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 8th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 9th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 11th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 11th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 11th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 12th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 15th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 24th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 27th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 32nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 32nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 33rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 36th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 38th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 38th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 50th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 56th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 59th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 60th in the regionTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 62nd in the regionMost Secular: 89th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 105th in the regionMost Cultured: 107th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 108th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 108th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 118th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 135th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 141st in the regionNudest: 295th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 318th in the regionMost Inclusive: 325th in the regionMost Stationary: 355th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 365th in the regionLargest Populations: 403rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 430th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 459th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Black Market.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Smartest Citizens, Most Cheerful Citizens, Largest Publishing Industry, and Highest Workforce Participation Rate.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Stationary.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Stationary.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Trout Fishing Sector.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Smartest Citizens and the Top 5% for Most Stationary.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Publishing Industry.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Trout Fishing Sector.
  • : Noahs Second Country was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Valuable International Artwork.

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