The Unified States of Northmore is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Great and Powerful Nathan with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and otherworldly petting zoo. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 35.226 billion Northmoreans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The minute, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare receive no funds. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Northmorean economy, worth a remarkable 8,032 trillion mollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Automobile Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 228,035 mollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 700,869 per year while the poor average 57,355, a ratio of 12.2 to 1.

Women are often jailed for failing to fetch their husbands' slippers, vacationing Northmoreans expect to be treated as royalty, parents must decide between buying food and taking their children to the park, and college athletes are arrested for selling lemonade. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Northmore's national animal is the llama, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Northmore is ranked 84,202^nd in the world and 1^st in Boardracing for Lowest Crime Rates, with 67.97 law-abiding acts per hour.