The フェデレーション of Nowa Europa is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Prezydent Iga Świątek with a fair hand, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, smutty television, and exploding hoverboards. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 14.731 billion Nowa Europeans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Silesia. The average income tax rate is 36.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Nowa Europan economy, worth a remarkable 5,538 trillion banknotes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 375,959 banknotes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.9 times as much as the poorest.

Rioting during the nation's hosting of ORDER caused one million banknotes of property damage, only the wealthy can afford monorail fares, the only film released this month was "Atheistvengers: Scientific Literacy War", and public ferries only carry enough lifeboats for the first-class passengers. Crime, especially youth-related, is a problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Nowa Europa's national animal is the Water Bear, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Nowa Europa is ranked 1,720^th in the world and 18^th in the South Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 14,170.77 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.