by Max Barry

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The Tsardom of Nuremgard

Nuremgard was Commended by Security Council Resolution # 318

“Никогда не будите спящего медведя”

Category: Left-wing Utopia
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Enforcer

Location: The Confederacy of Free Nations



Population16.195 billion

CapitalSaint Petersburg
LeaderPrime Minister Daoud Ibrahim


The Tsardom of Nuremgard is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Prime Minister Daoud Ibrahim with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, absence of drug laws, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 16.195 billion Norsk are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The relatively small, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Saint Petersburg. The average income tax rate is 23.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Norsk economy, worth a remarkable 5,141 trillion roubles a year, is dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 317,484 roubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Ministry of Health has reported a sharp increase in the incidence of delayed menopause, a suspicious number of male students have joined the Ladies' Wrestling League, the government has pledged that not one drop of its citizens' blood will be spilt, and citizens try to pass off bottlecaps they found in their backyards as historical artifacts. Crime is totally unknown. Nuremgard's national animal is the bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Nuremgard is ranked 81,510th in the world and 17th in The Confederacy of Free Nations for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 1,752.46 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Most Secular: 218thNicest Citizens: 284thMost Compassionate Citizens: 294thMost Inclusive: 295thMost Cultured: 343rdLargest Publishing Industry: 415thMost Cheerful Citizens: 443rdLeast Corrupt Governments: 460thMost Developed: 486thHighest Poor Incomes: 493rdHealthiest Citizens: 493rdLongest Average Lifespans: 552ndMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 624thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 653rdMost Efficient Economies: 670thMost Pacifist: 676thSafest: 681stSmartest Citizens: 719thMost Beautiful Environments: 966thHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,100thBest Weather: 1,136thLargest Retail Industry: 1,570thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,641stHighest Average Incomes: 1,660thHighest Economic Output: 1,773rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,818thMost Influential: 1,941stTop
Largest Information Technology Sector: 2,430thLowest Crime Rates: 3,113thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,382ndLargest Governments: 3,854thLargest Welfare Programs: 5,030thMost Subsidized Industry: 5,491stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 5,616thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 7,427thMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,271stRudest Citizens: 8,564thMost Advanced Public Education: 9,756thMost Stationary: 10,689thTop
Largest Populations: 11,606thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 12,007thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 13,931stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 17,748thMost Income Equality: 21,982nd
Least Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionSafest: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionNicest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionMost Pacifist: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionMost Inclusive: 1st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1st in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 1st in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2nd in the regionBest Weather: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 2nd in the regionTop
Most Influential: 3rd in the regionLargest Populations: 4th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 4th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 4th in the region

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